Powerful video. Raising an important issue.

[shulem92]

This is a JS thread. It's just mislabeled.

U didn't read the OP's post?

[David Smith]

U didn't read the OP's post?

The OP intentionally mislabeled it.

[Saver2000]

I dont know this guy personally but most of these kids do not welcome help from the community. Maybe only when things are really bad they may beg for help. Do you have any personal
experience with these cases?

They decline when its too late in the game. His idea is to raise awareness for prevention - before they get to the stage that they need the help that you're referring to.

[churnbabychurn]

http://yudelstake.blogspot.com/2016/08/the-churban-of-our-children-whos-at.html?m=1

[JTZ]

http://yudelstake.blogspot.com/2016/08/the-churban-of-our-children-whos-at.html?m=1

Now it is our fault, that is just peachy. 

[Sport]

https://www.facebook.com/simayarmush/posts/10153671936181254

Fortunately, he clarified what he intended to say: https://www.facebook.com/heshyj/videos/10153907772958763/

But never apologized for belittling the guy in the video.

[Aaaron]

But never apologized for belittling the guy in the video.

Nor for re-victimizing people.  I agree.  He clarified what he intended to say; unfortunately, it's not what he said. 

[elit]

https://www.facebook.com/simayarmush/posts/10153671936181254

Fortunately, he clarified what he intended to say: https://www.facebook.com/heshyj/videos/10153907772958763/

Link not working for me?

[yuneeq]

Nor for re-victimizing people.  I agree.  He clarified what he intended to say; unfortunately, it's not what he said.

Did you watch all 56 minutes or just the 3 minute clip?
Taken out of context you can make anyone sound like a demon.
Besides, R' Wallerstein has done far more for abuse victims than any of the whiners,
he deserves full benefit of the doubt.

[Shauly101]

Besides, R' Wallerstein has done far more for abuse victims than any of the whiners,
he deserves full benefit of the doubt.

+100!!!

https://www.torahanytime.com/#/lectures?v=32285
its power is when you listen to the FULL speech

[Aaaron]

Did you watch all 56 minutes or just the 3 minute clip?
Taken out of context you can make anyone sound like a demon.
Besides, R' Wallerstein has done far more for abuse victims than any of the whiners,
he deserves full benefit of the doubt.

Yes, I watched the whole thing.  And I did give him the benefit of the doubt; see my first post regarding it.  I understand that he's done a tremendous amount for victims of abuse, but even in context, the theatrics, tone, volume, blame, etc., were all unnecessary and clearly hurtful to people. 

Fortunately, he clarified what he intended to say

PS:  I hope you're not referring to the victims as whiners.

[yuneeq]

PS:  I hope you're not referring to the victims as whiners.

I meant other people

[elit]

Rabbi yakov horowitz:
Victims (and Survivors) Are Owed an Apology

I reserved comment on Rabbi Wallerstein’s Tisha B’av speech until now, hoping that an apology would be offered to the many, many abuse victims who were deeply hurt by the tone and content of Rabbi Wallerstein’s speech.
Unfortunately the clarification video he recently released did not include what the victims should be hearing from him in clear, unequivocal terms; “I’m deeply sorry for any pain my words have caused you.”
In the clarification video, Rabbi Wallerstein pointed out his many years of good work and advocacy for victims, for which he deserves our gratitude and respect. But, truth be told, abuse victims are often far more wounded and feel a far greater sense of betrayal when people who are on “their side of the fence” on these issues say hurtful things (see postscript below). It is all the more reason that an apology is in order here.
……………..
An important point must be made directly to abuse victims (and heard/understood by those who interact with them), namely that no one should ever, ever be telling you how deeply to grieve and at what point in your life you should “get over it.”
The great sage Hillel (Avos 2:4) astutely stated that “we should not judge our fellow man until we are in his place.” A very wise man that mentored me when I started working with teens-at-risk twenty years ago elaborated on the words of Hillel and said, “Until you are in his place, with his nature, his life experiences and his temperament.”
Worded differently, it is not only people who have not been abused who should refrain from telling you how you should be grieving, even someone who was abused should refrain from doing that – because his/her temperament is not like yours.
Grieving is unique to each and every person, and we cannot become whole again after a loss unless we grieve as we need to. Our sages understood this and crafted shiva laws accordingly – so that the mourner sets the terms of the shiva visit not the one paying the shiva call. We therefore do not speak in the presence of the mourner unless he/she speaks first. It’s the grieving person who gets to decide; no one else.
……………..
In closing, this entire incident screams out the reality that while anyone could and should offer support and encouragement to victims of abuse, only licensed mental health professionals who specialize in the treatment of abuse victims should be giving them advice on how to manage and deal with their searing pain.

P.S. Es chatai ani mazkir (I mention my sins; see Bereshis 41:9) – In 2009, my principled stand on the “Markey Bill” caused terrible pain to a large number of abuse victims. I posted "A Few Words to the Victims of Abuse" (link below) in response to that.   

P.P.S. Please consider supporting our efforts to improve child safety/abuse preventing for Israeli children by contributing to our crowdfunding campaign
https://www.youcaring.com/the-child-safety-initiative-of-cfjfl-project-yes-619170

[Eliyohu]

Nor for re-victimizing people.  I agree.  He clarified what he intended to say; unfortunately, it's not what he said.

Yes, I watched the whole thing.  And I did give him the benefit of the doubt; see my first post regarding it.  I understand that he's done a tremendous amount for victims of abuse, but even in context, the theatrics, tone, volume, blame, etc., were all unnecessary and clearly hurtful to people. 

PS:  I hope you're not referring to the victims as whiners.

Not quite sure how you cam say you watched the whole thing and yet say, he clarfied what he intended to say unfortunately its not what he said? Apparently you didn't listen very well... i guess some people need a 3 minute synopsis of a 56 minute speech, there was nothing he added other than his record of championing and advocating for victims.

Rabbi yakov horowitz:
Victims (and Survivors) Are Owed an Apology

I reserved comment on Rabbi Wallerstein’s Tisha B’av speech until now, hoping that an apology would be offered to the many, many abuse victims who were deeply hurt by the tone and content of Rabbi Wallerstein’s speech.
Unfortunately the clarification video he recently released did not include what the victims should be hearing from him in clear, unequivocal terms; “I’m deeply sorry for any pain my words have caused you.”
In the clarification video, Rabbi Wallerstein pointed out his many years of good work and advocacy for victims, for which he deserves our gratitude and respect. But, truth be told, abuse victims are often far more wounded and feel a far greater sense of betrayal when people who are on “their side of the fence” on these issues say hurtful things (see postscript below). It is all the more reason that an apology is in order here.
……………..
An important point must be made directly to abuse victims (and heard/understood by those who interact with them), namely that no one should ever, ever be telling you how deeply to grieve and at what point in your life you should “get over it.”
The great sage Hillel (Avos 2:4) astutely stated that “we should not judge our fellow man until we are in his place.” A very wise man that mentored me when I started working with teens-at-risk twenty years ago elaborated on the words of Hillel and said, “Until you are in his place, with his nature, his life experiences and his temperament.”
Worded differently, it is not only people who have not been abused who should refrain from telling you how you should be grieving, even someone who was abused should refrain from doing that – because his/her temperament is not like yours.
Grieving is unique to each and every person, and we cannot become whole again after a loss unless we grieve as we need to. Our sages understood this and crafted shiva laws accordingly – so that the mourner sets the terms of the shiva visit not the one paying the shiva call. We therefore do not speak in the presence of the mourner unless he/she speaks first. It’s the grieving person who gets to decide; no one else.
……………..
In closing, this entire incident screams out the reality that while anyone could and should offer support and encouragement to victims of abuse, only licensed mental health professionals who specialize in the treatment of abuse victims should be giving them advice on how to manage and deal with their searing pain.

P.S. Es chatai ani mazkir (I mention my sins; see Bereshis 41:9) – In 2009, my principled stand on the “Markey Bill” caused terrible pain to a large number of abuse victims. I posted "A Few Words to the Victims of Abuse" (link below) in response to that.   

Its very nicely worded statement however, There's no apology needed everytime someone cuts 3 minutes from a 56 minute speech. He also very clearly explained his state of being and state of mind... he was not telling anybody how deeply or how long to grieve, or even how to deal with their speciffic searing pain, all he doing was suggesting a specific thing that victims do, using their pain to point fingers and blame etc, he was offering a productive alternative be a survivor that he feels is a equal coping technique, but not Chas Vshalom to minimize or push away/ "get over it" attitude. He very clearly said hes not suggesting they get over it but rather use that uniuqe pain your feeling and come up yourself with coping technique and share it woth others.

[efflpetzel]

Amazingly how easily a decent soundtrack and the right lighting can turn a generation of educators into pedophiles.

What a stupid thing to say.

[efflpetzel]

The defensiveness possibly stems from arrogance and rishus.
I have no better way to explain why people get so angry when anyone lifts the curtain on some of the issues that affect our community.
I guess it makes some feel unclean?

Others here really do care, they are simply in denial. They can't believe how many heroin addicts litter the gutters of our heiligeh communities. Etc etc. so they deny.


The main purpose of the video is to bring more awareness to some of the pain our youth is in.

All of us should be aware of the fact that yes, just like in the non Jewish communities, not all children are brought up in perfect, happy, safe and healthy environments.
Some kids are in such pain that they can't live with it anymore.

We should all realize the risks of a child in a difficult situation.

This is very constructive. Not destructive.

He mentioned abuse. This does happen. This does exist. It does directly lead to bodies with dead souls..  Children who self medicate with dangerous deadly substances must be in serious serious pain. No??

He didn't say "all rabbis are molestors".  He said that this pain cannot and should not be dismissed as "mental illness"...

Those who deny the facts that the abused need to be protected, and taken seriously, have blood on their hands..

I can go on and on. The bottom line is that awareness can litteraly save lives.
You don't have to *do* anything. Just be aware of the children in pain. Be aware when bringing your own kids. Pay extra special attention to that sensitive child who seems to be in pain. Don't say eh, he'll grow out of it and be fine.

Is *your* child happy and healthy?? Make sure they are! Address their problems and issues.
Maybe it's a niece who's parents are going through something. Give her some extra attention, love and a smile. You can change and save lives.

Know the symptoms of drug abuse, so that when it CV affects someone close to you, you take immediate and appropriate action before it's too late.

I am fully convinced that awareness of our problems will save lives.

I'm gobsmacked. Is this really cbc?

First time in my life I've agreed with something you said!