"Ex-Hasidic Woman Marks Five Years Since She Shaved Her Head"

[notanonymous]

I can be totally off here, but does someone make sure the hair is short enough before she goes to mikva?

Mikveh attendant.

[jj1000]

I'll try not to go overboard here.

On a basic level for this situation I'd say the ability to maintain healthy relationships with your family and community after choosing to leave and with others accepting the choice you've made.

On a more complex level, and this is something I wanted to point out. Read that posted article and you will see something that I think is very commonplace. She talks about being afraid that if she grows her hair, her kids will get be stricken with horrible diseases. I think that this type of psychological conditioning ( which is something we all frum ppl have to one degree or another) takes away our freedom of choice just as much if not more than the other things I've mentioned.

How does that sound?

1. If joe shmoe decides to murder someone his family won't talk to him, so he doesn't have free choice not to murder?
2. Chabad kids are never taught anything like that AFAIK. so can't comment on that.
i.e. I don't like your definition or example as I can't relate. Going to have to try harder.

[notanonymous]

Yehuda: when it comes to a kallah being beautiful, it is customary to let go of chumros. a good chasidishe girl would never wear a white gown to an event either.

Oh, that's what he meant.

[yehuda S]

After?  A woman shaves before the mikveh.

She doesn't.  She shaves before.

Oops. That was supposed to say 'before the wedding'

[Satmar Lady]

jj:
no they don't. even if the woman chooses to grow her hair, and many of them do despite their Rebbe's teaching, the mikveh attendant wouldn't mention it. I heard this from 2 women, daughters of chassidish mikveh attendants.
and satmar kids aren't taught anything like that either! I was never told of any punishment whatsoever.

[yehuda S]

I can be totally off here, but does someone make sure the hair is short enough before she goes to mikva?

I've been told that there is zero hair left after shaving. Is this accurate?

If hair of any length is a problem do the eyebrows get shaved as well?

[Tzadik Nistar]

It wasn't mentioned here but there is also a reason in kabalah to shave all the hair and cut the nails from the "yemie nidah" because off רוח רע

[ganizzy]

In chabad, it is not encouraged to shave, in fact more the opposite
however, there is a recommendation on the length of the hair - pretty short, and i believe thats bec of mikvah reasons.

However no one in chabad is really concerned about anyone elses hair length. instead the Rebbe talked a lot about COVERING the hair completely and the brachos it brings

[jj1000]

It wasn't mentioned here but there is also a reason in kabalah to shave all the hair and cut the nails from the "yemie nidah" because off רוח רע

They cut their whole nail off?! OUCH!

On a serious note, which sefer kabbala is that in? Specifically that it is a ruach ra from yemie nidah.

[Tzadik Nistar]

They cut their whole nail off?! OUCH!

On a serious note, which sefer kabbala is that in? Specifically that it is a ruach ra from yemie nidah.

the ראשית חכמה brings it from the זוהר
Not the whole nail, just the hair and nail that grew in the yemie nidah

[jj1000]

the ראשית חכמה brings it from the זוהר
Not the whole nail, just the hair and nail that grew in the yemie nidah

Dude, the nail that grew is in the bottom of the finger. Think about it, and ya, that sounds painful.

ETA- Where in the zohar? Zohar, parashat Tazria, page 48b?

[ayman]

TY. Heard about this and wanted to see it, but didn't find it. (didn't know what it was called)

[Moishel]

Dude, the nail that grew is in the bottom of the finger.

Don't think they knew that back in the day.

[Moishel]

לכבוד אהובי תלמידי החריף צנא מלא ספרא הרב הגאון ... ני״ו עמו״ש

אחרי דרישת שלומך הטוב באהבה, הנני להשיבך בקצרה על שאלתך, כי צרותי רבו למעלה ראש וטרוד אני ברפואות ה״י.

תוכן שאלתך בקיצור היא בענין גילוח ראש לנשים, שכמה קהלות חסידיות קבלו עליהם תקנה שכל נשי בני הקהילה יגלחו את ראשם לגמרי. וקבעו עונש מי שלא יציית להוציאם מכלל הקהילה ולהוציא בניהם מהישיבה עד שיצייתו. ושאלתך היא האם תקנה זו היא בכלל תקנות קהלות לחיזוק הדת ומחויבים בני הקהלה לציית.

והאמת אגיד ולא אכחש, דלדעתי בכלל יש למעט בתקנות לאסור מה שהתירה תורתנו הקדושה, תורת אמת. וכבר אמרו דייך מה שאסרה תורה. וכל ערום יעשה בדעת.

אבל, אפילו במקום שרבני הקהילה רואים ענין הראוי לתקן, כחם יפה רק לתקן ולא לקלקל. ותקנה שיש בה אפילו שמץ איסור אין לה שום תוקף, וזה פשוט מאוד לכל בר בי רב.

לענינינו, בשו״ע יו״ד קפ״ב סעיף ה נפסק להלכה דנשים אסורות לגלח את הראש כמו האנשים מלא יהיה כלי גבר על אשה. ואין ספק, שבדורינו מנהג הנשים בכל המדינה היא שלא לגלח שערותיהן באופן כזה. ולפי זה, גילוח כזה לנשים היא איסור תורה ושום תקנה לא תועיל בזה דהוי כנשבע לבטל את המצוה שאין שבועתו חלה.

ומה ששאל האם בני הקהילה מחויבים לציית, חס מלהזכיר. והלא צריך אדם ליתן כל ממונו שלא יעבור על לא תעשה שבתורה. ודברי הרב ודברי התלמיד דברי מי שומעים. (ובדרך אגב, יש לעיין אם העונש ואמצעי הכפייה ששמו מנהיגי הקהילות על מי שלא יצייתו לתקנה הקלקלה הלזו הם בגדר שמד, דאין לך שמד יותר מהוצאת בנים מתלמוד תורה כי לא תשכח מפי זרעו. ואם כנו דברינו אפשר שזה בגדר יהרג ועל יעבור כערקתא דמסאני בשעת השמד.)

ובזה יצאתי ידי חובתי. והשם הטוב יתן בלב בניו לשוב אליו, והגם שתקנה הזאת היא בכלל מחטיאים את הרבים, עם כל זה בשובו מדרכו וחיה. והיה זה שלום

החותם בצער

ידידו.....

[jj1000]

Don't think they knew that back in the day.

lol. You serious?

[Cholentfresser]

Don't think they knew that back in the day.

ALOL!

[elikay]

Interesting.. http://www.roots-saknes.lv/Ethnicities/Jews/Pales/ShavedHeads.htm

[elikay]

סימן קה
http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=938&pgnum=140

[rots5]

ok, so i know im late to this whole convo: but can we discuss one point, the foundation to the whole article... what the hell??? why do we all have to hear about how every chasidishe girl that has a bad feeling going off the derech.. its sickening already! i dont care that people do this, but why write about it? why does she feel that she has to spread her crap, its useless and it just gives everyone a bad feeling!

its sad that this is how we live our life. "i went to sara lawrence... im not frum look at me" does this sound normal?

secondly: i understand that if a woman feels that she wans to shave her head whats the diff to anyone else? esp if the husband is ok with it.

whether anyone wants to admit it or not, i wont generalize but a lot of people who follow a specific sect of Judaism is part of a cult, esp those who feel that if someone who does kihalacha is a bad perosn for not doing the chumra's, and to put someone down who does the chumras also needs more confidence in what there doing!

[Jkhein]

Well said Rot5!!!!!
The even more sad part is that some people here who are actually quite intelligent I thought, actually believe the articles that these boys/girls write in the media to gain personal attention, or take revenge for the difficult childhood they had, guys not everything they write, describe, and exaggerate, is torah misinai! I happen to know some of the recent media noisemakers personally, and they are the kind that if you would know them personally too, you would understand why I am saying this.
Lately everyones attention media stomach ache, gets it's own thread on DDF for some reason