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DansDeals Forum => COVID-19 Discussion Board => Topic started by: Mordyk on March 15, 2020, 08:48:49 PM

Title: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 15, 2020, 08:48:49 PM
Are people pushing off wedding or hope for the best? I have a close wedding in two weeks and getting nervous of what rules might be in place at the time...
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: shmebeble on March 15, 2020, 08:50:10 PM
people are definitely pushing off weddings
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: EliJelly on March 15, 2020, 08:51:01 PM
Oh what a burning and common concern. So far people just hoping for the best. VERY difficult to push off.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Sam Finkelstein on March 15, 2020, 09:08:22 PM
I know of a wedding that was supposed to take place tomorrow, till the chosson’s sister tested positive and landed them into quarantine.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Holy Brother Dovid on March 15, 2020, 09:27:17 PM
Here is a bit of Hashgacha Pratis,

I made a reservation for the trip to a wedding and when I received the invitation, I was somewhat disappointed to see that Shabbos would end two hours after the wedding was scheduled.  I figured, I would get there in time for the dessert (inasmuch as the catered food was likely to be prepared on Shabbos and I would be unable to eat food cooked on Shabbos) and at least greet the happily married couple which is a mitzvah.  I did offer to arrange a "local" chuppah for those who could not make it!

The wedding has been postponed and although I was intent on using my reservation to visit my elderly father, I have now heard that his residence is on lockdown and most likely would not allow me to visit my Dad!

Could it be that HaShem did not want  the couple to begin their married life mechalel Shabbos? 

The reader is welcome to speculate and share their stories.

 
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 15, 2020, 09:28:26 PM
I know of a wedding that was supposed to take place tomorrow, till the chosson’s sister tested positive and landed them into quarantine.
Wow!  So sad :(

For us its weddings, for them it's their day that they have been waiting for!
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: moko on March 15, 2020, 10:12:11 PM
I believe many rabbanim paskened not to postpone weddings but rather carry on with the wedding with only a minyan present
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: grodnoking on March 15, 2020, 10:29:32 PM
I believe many rabbanim paskened not to postpone weddings but rather carry on with the wedding with only a minyan present
Seems to be what will happen with my cousin next week. 10 men, that's all.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: chbochur on March 15, 2020, 10:35:22 PM
My brothers as well. Gonna happen (assuming chosson can travel to the kallah or vice versa) but going from 800 people to maybe 15.
Really feeling terrible for them.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: incendia on March 15, 2020, 10:44:25 PM

Could it be that HaShem did not want  the couple to begin their married life mechalel Shabbos? 


I think there are better ways for Hashem to do that, that don't involve the death of thousands
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: TimT on March 15, 2020, 10:55:15 PM
These wedding “takanus” should be made more permanent. Save people gazillions of dollars.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Chapshnell on March 15, 2020, 11:04:14 PM
These wedding “takanus” should be made more permanent. Save people gazillions of dollars.

not as extreme but absolutely
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: hvaces42 on March 15, 2020, 11:14:16 PM
My brothers as well. Gonna happen (assuming chosson can travel to the kallah or vice versa) but going from 800 people to maybe 15.
Really feeling terrible for them.
See how they did it in Merkaz Harav today. Was Beautiful. Everyone standing on balconies singing. If possible.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: chbochur on March 15, 2020, 11:15:33 PM
See how they did it in Merkaz Harav today. Was Beautiful. Everyone standing on balconies singing. If possible.
Was gonna be in Mara Lago. Not sure we can pull that off over there:)
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: etech0 on March 15, 2020, 11:29:13 PM
https://matzav.com/innovative-couple-bypasses-10-person-gathering-limit-by-getting-married-at-a-grocery-story/
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: RewardsAddict on March 15, 2020, 11:47:34 PM
I know of a wedding that was supposed to take place tomorrow, till the chosson’s sister tested positive and landed them into quarantine.
WOW. Ouch.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Sam Finkelstein on March 16, 2020, 12:06:20 AM
WOW. Ouch.
Apparently everyone was very understanding, though.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: as2 on March 17, 2020, 09:07:37 PM
I'm working with a local organization to set up food distribution at a location, and mid meeting (3:00pm ish) we had a party planner roll in and start setting up for a wedding mere hours later. One of the halls here is in a building connected to retirement home. I got married there myself. Apparently a resident tested positive and the entire building, flowers, food, and all, went on lockdown. They ended up transferring it all over in atter of hours to a more local cheder gym/lunchroom. Craziness.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: mochjas on March 17, 2020, 10:52:46 PM
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 17, 2020, 11:34:24 PM
might as well make it in a cramped hall. :-\
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: zh cohen on March 18, 2020, 07:54:38 AM
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10158412376472650&id=662697649
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 18, 2020, 08:16:32 AM
https://www.bhol.co.il/news/1088647
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 18, 2020, 04:24:51 PM
so many small weddings going on and i literally cry by each video.  its less than what they did in the old shtetl.  barely minyan for bentching. and there is nothing we can do about it.  many couples are taking it in stride. but some looked like they were on the verge of crying   :'( :'( :'(
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: momo on March 18, 2020, 04:32:43 PM
so many small weddings going on and i literally cry by each video.  its less than what they did in the old shtetl.  barely minyan for bentching. and there is nothing we can do about it.  many couples are taking it in stride. but some looked like they were on the verge of crying   :'( :'( :'(
This is worth crying over?! Bh they are getting married! Hopefully everyone will stay healthy. With the zchus of not having blood on their hands, by not perpetuating the spread of the virus, they can go and build a bayis neman.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 18, 2020, 04:36:21 PM
This is worth crying over?! Bh they are getting married! Hopefully everyone will stay healthy. With the zchus of not having blood on their hands, by not perpetuating the spread of the virus, they can go and build a bayis neman.
its not about if its worth crying. and obviously new home is a beautiful thing. its still sad to see the day they dreamed of go up in smokes
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Chapshnell on March 18, 2020, 04:36:47 PM
This is worth crying over?! Bh they are getting married! Hopefully everyone will stay healthy. With the zchus of not having blood on their hands, by not perpetuating the spread of the virus, they can go and build a bayis neman.

Amen x 1 billion
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: avromie7 on March 18, 2020, 04:37:34 PM
This is worth crying over?! Bh they are getting married! Hopefully everyone will stay healthy. With the zchus of not having blood on their hands, by not perpetuating the spread of the virus, they can go and build a bayis neman.
None of this changes the fact that it's a very sad situation.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Chapshnell on March 18, 2020, 04:37:53 PM
its not about if its worth crying. and obviously new home is a beautiful thing. its still sad to see the day they dreamed of go up in smokes

100% but this is what Hashem wants now, its easy to say though, it must be very hard for them.
But its OK to feel "hope" that a middle way can be adopted going forward
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on March 18, 2020, 04:59:49 PM
100% but this is what Hashem wants now, its easy to say though, it must be very hard for them.
But its OK to feel "hope" that a middle way can be adopted going forward
It would be much harder for them if something ch"v happens to, lets say, a grandparent from them not being careful enough.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: RewardsAddict on March 18, 2020, 06:28:00 PM
It would be much harder for them if something ch"v happens to, lets say, a grandparent from them not being careful enough.
While this is true, put yourself into their shoes for a minute. Imagine you are the choson getting married. This is once in a lifetime for you. You dreamt of this day from the day you were born. Wouldnt you be disappointed? I applaud each and every one of such chasunos as it is absolutely the right thing to do in such a time. But I cannot imagine how tough it is for them.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on March 18, 2020, 06:46:23 PM
While this is true, put yourself into their shoes for a minute. Imagine you are the choson getting married. This is once in a lifetime for you. You dreamt of this day from the day you were born. Wouldnt you be disappointed? I applaud each and every one of such chasunos as it is absolutely the right thing to do in such a time. But I cannot imagine how tough it is for them.
Exactly!!   I spoke to a chosson getting married sometime soon(they arent even sure when!)  Sad situation
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on March 18, 2020, 06:47:37 PM
While this is true, put yourself into their shoes for a minute. Imagine you are the choson getting married. This is once in a lifetime for you. You dreamt of this day from the day you were born. Wouldnt you be disappointed? I applaud each and every one of such chasunos as it is absolutely the right thing to do in such a time. But I cannot imagine how tough it is for them.
1000%
As I wrote in a different thread, this is happening with a cousin.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Luvisrael on March 18, 2020, 08:13:24 PM
https://matzav.com/innovative-couple-bypasses-10-person-gathering-limit-by-getting-married-at-a-grocery-story/
only Israelis!!
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on March 18, 2020, 08:24:04 PM
This is worth crying over?! Bh they are getting married! Hopefully everyone will stay healthy. With the zchus of not having blood on their hands, by not perpetuating the spread of the virus, they can go and build a bayis neman.
Yeah, it's worth crying over not having your parents or grandparents by your wedding.

My grandmothers are missing their granddaughter's wedding next week. They've been praying and dreaming about being at her wedding for more than a decade. It's absolutely the correct decision. Doesn't make it any less heart breaking.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: EliJelly on March 18, 2020, 08:28:27 PM
Heard from someone who marries off in two weeks that he'll give the money saved to the newly wed couple. Grand idea when you can afford that!
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: cohen220 on March 18, 2020, 08:50:37 PM
Why are people not pushing off weddings for the time being? Is that not an option?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on March 18, 2020, 08:55:24 PM
Why are people not pushing off weddings for the time being? Is that not an option?

See above in this thread. If anything people are making them earlier. The wedding I was referring to, the couple got engaged last week.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: mmgfarb on March 18, 2020, 09:03:48 PM
I'm working with a local organization to set up food distribution at a location, and mid meeting (3:00pm ish) we had a party planner roll in and start setting up for a wedding mere hours later. One of the halls here is in a building connected to retirement home. I got married there myself. Apparently a resident tested positive and the entire building, flowers, food, and all, went on lockdown. They ended up transferring it all over in atter of hours to a more local cheder gym/lunchroom. Craziness.
I was supposed to be at that wedding  :-X
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Chapshnell on March 18, 2020, 09:04:29 PM
Why are people not pushing off weddings for the time being? Is that not an option?

By chasidim we dont push off a wedding.
In addition a wedding used to look a little similar to what youre seeing now.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: cohen220 on March 18, 2020, 09:12:14 PM
I know people don't push off weddings, I'm asking what is the source?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: as2 on March 18, 2020, 09:14:00 PM
By chasidim we dont push off a wedding.
In addition a wedding used to look a little similar to what youre seeing now.
Hopefully one day it will again!
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: chbochur on March 18, 2020, 09:18:22 PM
I know people don't push off weddings, I'm asking what is the source?
At least for chabad sources

Once the date for a wedding has been fixed, the custom is that it is not postponed (and certainly if there is no valid reason to do so).
אגרות קודש ח"י ע' יב
.
 If for whatever reason both mechutanim agreed to postpone the date of a wedding, then on the day that was originally fixed as the wedding day, they should write Tenaim (in addition to the fact that they had already made a Vort) and the parents from both sides should get together and discuss matters pertaining to the forthcoming wedding. This meeting should be in the form of a simchah gathering with a Seudas Mitzvah, such as a Siyum Masechta or a Melave Malka, and they should farbreng — with simchah.
אגרות קודש ח"ז ע' לח
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on March 18, 2020, 09:57:37 PM
See above in this thread. If anything people are making them earlier. The wedding I was referring to, the couple got engaged last week.
So why are they doing this?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: RewardsAddict on March 18, 2020, 10:17:59 PM
So why are they doing this?
Because noone knows whats going to be tomorrow. There is no telling when we will be able to have normal weddings again.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: yfr bachur on March 19, 2020, 07:08:04 AM
so many small weddings going on and i literally cry by each video.  its less than what they did in the old shtetl.  barely minyan for bentching. and there is nothing we can do about it.  many couples are taking it in stride. but some looked like they were on the verge of crying   :'( :'( :'(

Hopefully this can teach us that we dont need to spend tens of thousands of dollars for one nights party,
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 19, 2020, 09:02:16 AM
Hopefully this can teach us that we dont need to spend tens of thousands of dollars for one nights party,
Does the bride and groom (sorry don't know the Jewish names) make back in gifts what the wedding costs?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 19, 2020, 09:13:25 AM
Does the bride and groom (sorry don't know the Jewish names) make back in gifts what the wedding costs?

I doubt it. In our communities people get invited easily to over 30 weddings per year.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 19, 2020, 09:16:45 AM
I doubt it. In our communities people get invited easily to over 30 weddings per year.
I paid for our wedding and it was a net plus. Guessing most basic weddings are that way. Many like to have an idea how much a plate it is. They will give that plus a gift (mostly monetary).
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 19, 2020, 09:30:37 AM
I paid for our wedding and it was a net plus. Guessing most basic weddings are that way. Many like to have an idea how much a plate it is. They will give that plus a gift (mostly monetary).

Do you think people would give that much at today's prices and if they got invited to 30 weddings per year?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on March 19, 2020, 09:35:01 AM
Does the bride and groom (sorry don't know the Jewish names) make back in gifts what the wedding costs?
The Jewish names are Chaim Todres and Chasheh Dvoshah
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 19, 2020, 09:36:53 AM
Do you think people would give that much at today's prices and if they got invited to 30 weddings per year?
When I got married my Mom wanted to know what everyone gave (she was old school). She would basically give the same.
A busy year for us would be 5 or 6 weddings.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 19, 2020, 09:41:19 AM
When I got married my Mom wanted to know what everyone gave (she was old school). She would basically give the same.
A busy year for us would be 5 or 6 weddings.

At that pace (no more than 6 per year) that makes perfect sense. But as I said, that is not the case in our communities.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: gingyguy on March 19, 2020, 10:00:48 AM
At that pace (no more than 6 per year) that makes perfect sense. But as I said, that is not the case in our communities.
+1 could easily be that month in a month from family only
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 19, 2020, 10:07:09 AM
+1 could easily be that month in a month from family only
Remember our families do not have 18 kids each.  ;)
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 19, 2020, 10:28:06 AM
Remember our families do not have 18 kids each.  ;)
Right. Which is the reason for the difference. Even at half that number of kids, with (hopefully. Definitely a stated goal) of getting married no later than the early to mid twenties, and with this virus ravaging around, you should have gotten your math lesson about exponential growth.

FTR, even with my married daughter and her family staying with us, we are still slightly short of 18 people in the house at the moment.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 19, 2020, 10:30:24 AM
Right. Which is the reason for the difference. Even at half that number of kids, with (hopefully. Definitely a stated goal) of getting married no later than the early to mid twenties, and with this virus ravaging around, you should have gotten your math lesson about exponential growth.
Math was never my week (now a certain member won't know if I am doing it on purpose) point.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: gingyguy on March 19, 2020, 11:05:23 AM
Math was never my week (now a certain member won't know if I am doing it on purpose) point.
feel free to call me out by name !!! ;D
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: chbochur on March 20, 2020, 05:07:39 AM
https://matzav.com/watch-rav-elimelech-bidermans-message-to-chosson-kallahs-getting-married-during-these-turbulent-times/
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 20, 2020, 08:24:00 AM
https://anash.org/gallery-corona-couldnt-stop-this-wedding/

I guess original credit goes to Pittsburgh for the idea, Crown Heights just scaled it up.

@CountValentine, how many of these do you think it's reasonable to attend? I was happy to take part and attend this one despite being barely third circle.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: yeshivabucher on March 20, 2020, 09:11:40 AM
Going to a wedding of a close friend this Sunday on a cul de sac in Monsey everyone was given time  slots to come and chuppa is for family only
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 20, 2020, 09:31:14 AM
https://anash.org/gallery-corona-couldnt-stop-this-wedding/

I guess original credit goes to Pittsburgh for the idea, Crown Heights just scaled it up.

@CountValentine, how many of these do you think it's reasonable to attend? I was happy to take part and attend this one despite being barely third circle.
Good idea but a couple pictures showed large groups.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: RewardsAddict on March 20, 2020, 09:45:59 AM
Going to a wedding of a close friend this Sunday on a cul de sac in Monsey everyone was given time  slots to come and chuppa is for family only
Had same. Cousin got married this week and gave everyone time slots not to exceed 50 people.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ExGingi on March 20, 2020, 09:49:47 AM
Good idea but a couple pictures showed large groups.

What do you call large groups? Is the frame that has me in it one of them? We're actually a smaller group there and outdoors, than we are the rest of the time indoors?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 20, 2020, 09:53:26 AM
What do you call large groups?
Frame 8 with the canopy in it.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Luvisrael on March 22, 2020, 09:39:56 AM
Two people were arrested in Lakewood for making weddings
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: TimT on March 22, 2020, 09:44:49 AM
Two people were arrested in Lakewood for making weddings
Was being reported as fake news
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Luvisrael on March 22, 2020, 09:48:53 AM
Was being reported as fake news
really? Saw article with names
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: yesitsme on March 22, 2020, 11:12:27 AM
My daughters birthday is today and the birthday party.........................
you should never be in this situation only better ones


BTW she's turning 3, but she's talking about her birthday party for 10 months and....
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on March 22, 2020, 11:15:16 AM
BTW she's turning 3, but she's talking about her birthday party for 10 months and....
:'(
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Luvisrael on March 22, 2020, 11:16:15 AM
My daughters birthday is today and the birthday party.........................
you should never be in this situation only better ones


BTW she's turning 3, but she's talking about her birthday party for 10 months and....
Aww poor girl. An idea. Have as many friends and family record videos sending happy bday wishes.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ad120 on March 22, 2020, 11:19:44 AM
Aww poor girl. An idea. Have as many friends and family record videos sending happy bday wishes.
Or buy a cake and make a video conference.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on April 01, 2020, 01:43:09 AM
Any ideas to add some excitement to a couple getting married now (in a small ceremony of about 10 people)? Looking for some idea that many people can be involved.  Like a message board for mazel tovs or something like that...  any ideas are appreciated
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: S209 on April 01, 2020, 03:16:04 AM
so many small weddings going on and i literally cry by each video.  its less than what they did in the old shtetl.  barely minyan for bentching. and there is nothing we can do about it.  many couples are taking it in stride. but some looked like they were on the verge of crying   :'( :'( :'(
This is not what you should be crying about. And tbh there’s nothing sad about it. The wedding industry has been one of the things holding people back from financial independence for a long time and I sincerely hope people take a lesson from this that it DOESN’T MATTER
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on April 01, 2020, 07:09:50 AM
This is not what you should be crying about. And tbh there’s nothing sad about it. The wedding industry has been one of the things holding people back from financial independence for a long time and I sincerely hope people take a lesson from this that it DOESN’T MATTER
The chosson and kallah can't be expected to understand that
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Mordyk on April 01, 2020, 09:07:26 AM
This is not what you should be crying about. And tbh there’s nothing sad about it. The wedding industry has been one of the things holding people back from financial independence for a long time and I sincerely hope people take a lesson from this that it DOESN’T MATTER
-100000


Yes it does matter.  There is a huge difference between the crazy lavish weddings that are unnecessary and a wedding with 10 people wearing masks and gloves that is basically a come and go...
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: CountValentine on April 01, 2020, 10:18:17 AM
Any ideas to add some excitement to a couple getting married now (in a small ceremony of about 10 people)? Looking for some idea that many people can be involved.  Like a message board for mazel tovs or something like that...  any ideas are appreciated
Stream it?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on April 01, 2020, 10:31:54 AM
This is not what you should be crying about. And tbh there’s nothing sad about it. The wedding industry has been one of the things holding people back from financial independence for a long time and I sincerely hope people take a lesson from this that it DOESN’T MATTER
The lack of empathy in this post....

Yeah, it's worth crying over not having your parents or grandparents by your wedding.

My grandmothers are missing their granddaughter's wedding next week. They've been praying and dreaming about being at her wedding for more than a decade. It's absolutely the correct decision. Doesn't make it any less heart breaking.

The wedding was beautiful in its simplicity. It was still breathtakingly sad at the same time.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: etech0 on April 01, 2020, 11:03:04 AM
Any ideas to add some excitement to a couple getting married now (in a small ceremony of about 10 people)? Looking for some idea that many people can be involved.  Like a message board for mazel tovs or something like that...  any ideas are appreciated
You can make a gmail account and have all the non-guests send mazal tov wishes (written/video clips/whatever they want). Then at the wedding give the log in info to the chosson and kallah so they can see it all after.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on April 01, 2020, 11:12:30 AM
The lack of empathy in this post....

The wedding was beautiful in its simplicity. It was still breathtakingly sad at the same time.
See the letter in last week's Yated from my wifes uncles to his grandaughter whose wedding he missed
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on April 01, 2020, 11:14:36 AM
See the letter in last week's Yated from my wifes uncles to his grandaughter whose wedding he missed
Picture? Link?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: aygart on April 01, 2020, 11:22:07 AM
Picture? Link?
Not sure if I still have it.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: 12HRS on April 01, 2020, 02:40:38 PM
The chosson and kallah can't be expected to understand that

Do you think that can be changed?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: yeshivabucher on April 01, 2020, 02:45:30 PM
The chosson and kallah can't be expected to understand that
i would say as one myself that a good amount of us are looking at the situation with the perspective is that whats the most important thing getting married or doing it in a nice hall with all your family and friends and while it may be hard we are happy to make the best of the situation we are put in and not let all the (close) secondary priorities get in the way of the biggest day in our lives
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: S209 on April 01, 2020, 02:53:41 PM
The lack of empathy in this post....

The wedding was beautiful in its simplicity. It was still breathtakingly sad at the same time.

I disagree. I don’t think it’s sad that we can’t continue to do something that is seemingly mandatory and necessary only because we’ve been foolishly doing it for a long time. There is r”l no dearth of objectively sad events occurring now.

I was commenting on the size of weddings; OP mentioned that it was sad because it was small. Your point that at least family should be attending is fair. It is certainly sad when a grandparent cannot attend the wedding of their own grandchild.

Still, point taken.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yehuda57 on April 01, 2020, 03:01:47 PM
I disagree. I don’t think it’s sad that we can’t continue to do something that is seemingly mandatory and necessary only because we’ve been foolishly doing it for a long time. There is r”l no dearth of objectively sad events occurring now.

I was commenting on the size of weddings; OP mentioned that it was sad because it was small. Your point that at least family should be attending is fair. It is certainly sad when a grandparent cannot attend the wedding of their own grandchild.

Still, point taken.
This wedding would have had 400-500 people just with family and close friends only. It would have had a one man band, no open bar, no extravagances. Why shouldn't weddings be celebrated like that?

There was barely a minyan at the chupah. 2600 people tuned in to live stream.

Big doesn't always mean lavish. And even lavish isn't always wasteful.
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yammer on April 01, 2020, 03:12:36 PM
This wedding would have had 400-500 people just with family and close friends only. It would have had a one man band, no open bar, no extravagances. Why shouldn't weddings be celebrated like that?

There was barely a minyan at the chupah. 2600 people tuned in to live stream.

Big doesn't always mean lavish. And even lavish isn't always wasteful.
שביל הזהב
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: ari3 on April 01, 2020, 04:15:59 PM
Why are people so hesitant to delay a wedding under current circumstances? Halacha? Minhag? Feelings?
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Chapshnell on April 01, 2020, 04:29:52 PM
Why are people so hesitant to delay a wedding under current circumstances? Halacha? Minhag? Feelings?

By chasidim definitely a minhag, cant speak for others
Title: Re: Weddings in next few weeks
Post by: Yammer on April 07, 2020, 12:23:44 AM
Why are people so hesitant to delay a wedding under current circumstances? Halacha? Minhag? Feelings?
I would say it depends on how close to the wedding it is..

For weddings that were supposed to take place right after this whole thing happened it's too close to push it off indefinitely, when noone knows how long it will go on.

For weddings after Lag Beomer I'm assuming we will see many more pushing off the weddings