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Re: Do you daven out loud?

On the one hand the young Israel crowd always stand up for yehei shmay rabba but they are so timid.

As a member of the 'young israel crowd', when I daven Shabbos morning at a more yeshivish minyan and/or some chasidish minyanim, I miss the taam tefila - it's just moaning and 'krechtzing' - what happened to Ivdo es hashem b'simcha?

If you think davening is timid, I would suggest you've been to the wrong Young Israels :)

On the subject of kol ram -  I am one of those people who has a voice that carries (It's a mixed blessing, believe me). I don't need to put in effort to bring out my kol ram, I just need to talk. When I said kaddish for each of my parents, I hated walking into a shul where everyone was out of sync when it came to kaddish. You have one person flying through kaddish who is two 'amens' ahead of everyone else, and another (maybe a BT, or someone early in their aveilus where the emotions are strongest) who is struggling with it. I couldn't take it, so I took over. I said kaddish at a loud and deliberate pace (never too slow to cause tircha d'tzibura of course, but I did slow down if I knew that others needed a slower pace).

While I know that can be construed as arrogant and selfish, I try to think of it differently: hashem gave me the opportunity to be the metronome for the other avelim to enable all of us to say kaddish at the same speed so that the kahal can answer amen in unison - so that we merit a z'chus for all of the neshamos that we're saying kaddish for.

February 05, 2019, 08:52:59 AM
Virgin Atlantic to start LHR - TLV flights in Sept. Via Globes -
February 08, 2019, 11:08:11 AM
Re: Largest Dispute & Fraudulent Activity on your card Not a large dispute, but while in my 20's someone charged a meal on one of my cards. I called to dispute it. They asked me if I was sure it wasn't me. I told them I was an Orthodox Jew, and the charge was to a non-kosher restaurant on a Saturday.
February 14, 2019, 12:51:24 PM
Re: Man livestreams himself shooting up a mosque
They don't either understand that not all Jews are George Soros. They don't understand that not all Jews push an intersectional, interracial agenda or force people to accept that males and females are interchangeable. They don't understand that not all Jews are Karl Marx or Leon Trotsky. In fact, those so called "Jews" are not religious at all and don't care about Judaism in the least. Yet the meme propaganda that White Supremacist Nazis post are always of Jews with a beard, yarmulke and payos -- the Jews that are actually Right wing and Conservative.

These people hate Jews far more than they hate Muslims. They are angry and writing how this was all in vain because "he didn't mention the Jew" in his manifesto and that he didn't kill even one Jew.

I think about this a lot, even more now that there seems to be anti-semitic acts cropping up in the news daily. I work in a firm where, quite literally, I am one of two shomer shabbos people in the firm, and the only one to wear a yarmulka. There are many other jews in the firm, but very few of them have any kind of 'shaychus'.

I realized, that for most of these people, I am the ONLY Orthodox person they know, and possibly have ever known. I am the source of all of their questions about Judaism and the mideast.  I get asked questions (thankfully know one at work has asked me the 'sheet' question) ranging from - "Why is Israel killing Palestinian Babies'? to 'My daughter is going to a friend's bat mitzvah next week, how should she dress for synagogue?".

In a sense, I am the ambassador for the jewish people, and I do my best to be a good ambassador.

IMHO, most hatred comes from ignorance. If you do your best to educate the haters, some of them might just become non-haters.

March 15, 2019, 03:38:59 PM
Re: Moving Violation Tickets
I got pulled over in Montvale literally a block away from New York. Didn't think of it at the time but wondering what would have happened if I kept driving. Anyone know?

I am not a lawyer or a cop, but I am under the impression that:
- Out of Jurisdiction only applies if a Police officer from Jurisdiction A observed you committing a crime in Jurisdiction B. i.e. If a cop from Pearl River had driven into Montvale and saw you speeding in Montvale, he couldn't issue you a ticket.

- I believe that there are some elements of hot pursuit that allow cops from Jurisdiction A to pursue someone who committed a crime in their Jurisdiction to another one if they cross the border while being chased. Example - if NYPD is chasing a criminal from Riverdale into Yonkers, they don't stop (they might call Yonkers PD during the pursuit though).

- I would also imagine, if a cop saw you speeding in his jurisdiction and got your plate #, he could issue you a ticket by mail - doesn't really happen, but AFAIK perfectly legal. If you go to fight it, and your grounds for fighting it are that the ticket was written and issued in another jurisdiction, the judge can dismiss without prejudice, and then the cop can re-issue you a ticket right there in court. Since the courthouse is likely in his jurisdiction, your technicality is gone, and the cop will be less inclined to settle.

Along the lines of the last one, about 15 years ago, I got a ticket for speeding in White Plains, NY (officer said I was doing 38 in a 30). I decided to fight it. Never having gotten a ticket before, I misread the back of the ticket and thought that my plea response date was actually a court date. I showed up in the courthouse, only to be told I had to enter a plea. I went to the clerks window to submit my not guilty plea, and as I handed it in, she asked if I wanted the officer's deposition. I said yes and checked the box. Months went by. I was getting worried that I had missed the notice, would miss my court date and have issues with my license. I kept calling the courthouse, and they kept telling me that I would eventually get a date, and to keep trying. 18 months later, I got a court date, 3 months out, but no deposition. I called the courthouse about it, they told me to mention it to the judge.

I go to court on the court date. I wore a suit and tie - after all it is court - I was shocked at how many people were in shorts and t-shirts. I had a pre-trial meeting with the judge's clerk, and the officer. I told him I never received his deposition. They both looked at the ticket, and noticed that the box was checked. That's when he turns to me and says - that's okay, the judge will dismiss it - but without prejudice. Once he does, I will re-issue you the ticket. I assumed that he was using it as a chip to get me to pay a fine in lieu of points. Not knowing if he was correct or not, I very respectfully turned to him and said - 'excuse me officer, can you remind me what the statute of limitations is for a moving violation in NY?' He looked down at the date in my ticket, and then turned back to me and said - 'this is your lucky day'. Of course, he made me wait around another 30-45 minutes until the judge formally dismissed me - I think he was annoyed at having screwed up.

March 28, 2019, 11:10:17 AM
Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
Didn't see this anywhere on the board but figured it should be posted anyways:

Zachary Baumel Z"L 37 years late.

About 25 years ago, I met his parents at an event to get college students to campaign for his and other Israeli POWs release. Sadly his father was niftar 10 years ago, without having the closure of burying his son. May both of them rest in peace.

April 05, 2019, 02:29:16 PM
Re: Moving Violation Tickets With my limited experience (5 moving violations tix in 20+ years of driving) I can safely say that NYC was the one place where there was no plea deal offered pre-trial - in any form. Thankfully the judge was sympathetic, and dismissed my case - here are the details:

Long story shot, my dad had a heart condition, and was scheduled to have surgery. Two days before the surgery, his heart acted up and he was taken to the ER. I was his health care proxy, and wanted to make sure I was there in person if any decisions needed to be made, as well as to make sure he was transferred to the hospital where the surgery was to take place. I got in my car and started driving. I was clocked at 80+ in a50mph zone in NYC. When I was pulled over, I explained the situation to the police officer in a very calm manner. He went back to his car,  wrote me a ticket with 6 points (2 points for every 10mph over the limit), and told me that he was sorry for the situation, but if I explained it to the judge with documentation, that the judge would take it under consideration.

Fast forward about 1.5 years - when I finally got my court date. I went to the judge with the following documents: An ER Admission letter, a letter from my Dad's doctor listing the surgery date and that he was admitted to the ER on the date of the violation and was transferred for the surgery. I also had a copy of my health care proxy letter, and my dad's Death Certificate as well (although the surgery was successful, he died a month later due to an adverse reaction to his medication). I explained my case to the judge, including my conversation with the officer, and here was my documentation.

The judge then turns to the officer, and asks " - do you recall if he told you that he was on the way to the hospital." To which the officer replied " No". I was livid, I used every ounce of my self-control to not completely go ballistic. The judge asked me what I had to say about this, I calmed down, and responded - " Your honor, with all due respect to Officer ____, he is a traffic officer, and stops dozens of other individuals for speeding on a daily basis, so I can only imagine that he'd forgotten the details of a case with a person he had pulled over 15 months ago. I don't get pulled over, and it was one of the worst days of my life - I know exactly what happened. I remember the conversation vividly, which is exactly why I brought this documentation with me today." He then questioned, why I, as a health care proxy, would need to be there if my dad was already in the ER. As the line of questions continued, I became more emotional, having to re-hash my dad's illness and eventual death. I am not sure what exactly did it, but I think ultimately he realized the sincerity, and dismissed the case.

April 08, 2019, 03:42:01 PM
Re: Selling Chometz This whole idea is interesting. My father z"l didn't have this minhag, but my in-laws do, and my wife insisted that we follow along. I usually give the Rav two checks when I sell chometz one for him, and one for Maos Chitim. I also generally don't share the amount I give with others for a lot of reasons.

I often wondered about how this evolved. In my limited anecdotal evidence, I think it has to do with the financial model of your shul (or of the shul the family member you inherited this minhag from)

Most shuls have one of two models:
- A membership model where you pay one big membership dues per year that covers all costs of the shul
- A pay-for-play model (for lack of a better term) - where you pay a small or no membership fee, but every little thing has a dollar value - i.e. aliyah auctions etc.

in the former, especially in a large shul, I would image tipping the Rav is a lot less prevalent, because the Rav is drawing a decent salary, and it's likely that the shtellar is a his main parnash.

in the latter, especially if it's a shtieble, I think people are more inclined to give, as every little dollar goes to help the Rav and/or Bedek habayis.


April 15, 2019, 12:52:25 PM
Re: Pesach Torah Can't remember where I heard this, whom I heard it from, or if I heard the whole thing, but here goes:

If you look at the words Matzah and Chametz in Hebrew:
מצה and חמץ

The letters are pretty consistent - both have the letters Mem and Tzadi(k) and the only difference is the "Hey" of Matzah vs the "Chet" of Chametz. Looking even further, you'll notice that the Hey and the Chet are very similar in form, with the only difference being that the lower leg of the hay doesn't rise as high as the leg of the chet.

That gap in the Hey represents both our humility and our ego. Should we let our ego rise (like the dough of the bread) we're trying to elevate ourselves above our fellow man. Should we contain it, and not let it rise (like the dough of the matzah) we're exercising our personal humility for the greater good of the community. In other words, Matzah is supposed to remind us to Be humble.

Incidentally - the "Chet" in Chametz - is like the hebrew word "Chet" - which refers to the english word sin, while the Hay in Matzah is for hashem's name - being humble brings us closer to G-d and further from sin.

April 15, 2019, 05:25:03 PM
Re: Re: Lakewood NJ Master Thread
All you guys giving heat, Do you relize the flag was hung in honor of Israeli independents day?

That's basically agreeing with Zionist Ideology (maybe unintentionally) which you may or  may not agree with,
But I'm sure u'll agree that it is not crazy to hold against.

Quote from: yonah
You've got to be flipping kidding me. The next time someone asks me why Moshiach isn't here - I'll print them this article.

Let me quantify two things:
- While I Vehemently disagree with them, I don't think it's unreasonable for some in the frum world to have an issue with the state of Israel (however misguided I think that they are).
- However secular the founders of Medinat Yisroel were, they've allowed for the tremendous growth of torah that now exists, and they built the state with that in mind. For example, we're only arguing about the drafting of yeshiva bochurim because they've been more or less exempt for 70 years

So while I don't agree with those who are anti-Israel, I respect their right to do so, and their right to choose not to shop at a store that supports israel.

Here is what is crazy, and what I feel is true sinas chinam - the KCL's threats to remove the hashgacha because of it.

The kashrus of the food at SSSS didn't change when the flag went up - it's not as if the flag was used as wrapping paper for a crate of bacon that was now being used by sandwiches. It is not as if the flag has special powers that render the mashgiach incapable. It's not as if being a zionist disqualifies the owner from running a kosher establishment - and if it does - the blame should be on the KCL for not having properly vetted the owner before giving him a hashgacha. In fact, if that's the case - i.e. a Tizoni person isn't fit to run a kosher restaurant, and the KCL gave them a hashgacha - then the KCL's vetting process is flawed, and we shouldn't trust ANY establishment that they've given a Hashgacha to, until we verify in beis din that not one of their staff said hallel on Yom Ha'atzmaut! .

I am tired of the political BS that creeps up into kashrus. Kashrus should be about the food, but oftentimes kashrus agencies try to flex their muscles to put pressure on the owners of restaurants. It's not just local vaads, but also large organizations. I'm not sure if any of you remember the Pepsi Scandal in Israel in the early 90's or the 'Pizza Mechitza' in flatbush in the late 80's. Then there was the whole Kinder Egg import thing in Israel a few years ago as well.

and before you go off on me about 'the integrity' of kashrus - think about all of the scandals where people with a so-called good hechsher and reputation were playing games and deceiving their customers?

Sorry for the rant, but I am getting worked up, because this hit a chord.

May 10, 2019, 09:37:38 AM