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Re: POLL: Wedding expenses in the frum Community - BH for simchos? or out of hand? I guess I'll jump in...
DW and I both 22 when we got married. Actual wedding day costs 14k at the Concord al"h.  Including 1 man band $1500, flowers, hall and dinner for 350. Food was nothing to write home about but the wedding was amazing and would have been just as amazing if we got married at Sasson Vsimcha for $6000 all inclusive. (Some friends actually did). We didn't chose the hall. DW gown was borrowed, my suit was $99 JosBank clearance. After the wedding, we went straight to our very own 2.5 bedroom walk in level basement apartment in Brooklyn which we paid $1000 monthly for until we moved to Boston 7 years later.
Bedroom set was 3rd hand gift. Dining room table and chairs were purchased second hand made it all on our own and hosted all yamim tovim  the first 2 years we were married (hashem yeracheim  :) ) 7 years later we bought our own home in Boston with a 20% down payment and continued to lived in the basement of our home with  4 children bli ayin hara, while renting the top levels to replenish our savings . There are many just like us... Just doesn't make the "news" since we're just average Joe's living day to day, not millionaires but not 10s of thousands in debt... In short nothing news worthy.... This year we rented the basement and live upstairs and can finally afford our very own 14ft quarantinetrampoline in the backyard  :D

April 19, 2020, 06:51:37 PM
NISSIM!!! WELCOME BACK @MICKEYG!!!!!!,_But_Others_May_Be_Saved_By_The_Fight

Michael Goldsmith, 34 year old father of 2, is in critical condition and fighting for his life against COVID-19. Heís on a respirator, in a medically-induced coma.
Chasdei Hashem! After 25+ days on a ventilator.
If only I could remember, I'd give you a TR....

April 19, 2020, 09:47:38 PM
Re: POLL: Wedding expenses in the frum Community - BH for simchos? or out of hand? Warning: I'm going to rant here. Definitely my longest DDF post ever. If you don't read it, I don't blame you. If you quote my post, take out all the text so that it doesn't take up a whole page.

I just looked at the numbers in the Mishoacha article, and my one question is: Are the 7 case studies in their article an accurate representation of what people across jewish communities spend on weddings?

If they are an accurate representation, then I think we have a big issue aside from the actual wedding costs in our community. I'm not saying that a 250-person-wedding campaign isn't a good idea, but I think there's a completely separate issue here that needs to be addressed as well.

Looking at 4/7 of these cases:

1. Somone "lives from paycheck to paycheck" and "doesn't have money for extras" but spent $14k on gifts for the kallah and $17k on furniture/housewares/linnen/apartment setup? In addition to this campaign to reduce your $24k share of the actual wedding expenses, maybe we can work on cutting down the $31k of gifts and home furnishings?

2. Someone is "solidly middle class" and "carries credit card debt from month to month", but spent $7k on sheitels, $5.5k on clothing, $7.6k on shabbos sheva brachos and $2.5k on a watch? Reducing these other expenses might yield more savings than a klal-yisroel-wide revolution to trim your $27k share of wedding expenses a bit.

3. You say that "while the business is doing well, we still have some debt to pay off" and you "we didnít have any money in savings when our daughter got engaged" but you spent $16k on a vort, $8.5k on sheitels, $9k on clothing for the kallah (plus $5k on the gown), $15k on shabbos sheva brachos, $17k on gifts for the chassan (including a $2,350 silver kos), $11k on furniture, $6.5k on linens and towels (!), and $10k on piece of jewlery for the mother? Compared to trimming some of those ~$100k of expenses, I'm not sure that trying to cut down some of your $32k share of the wedding expenses is really such a big deal.

4. You're someone whose finances mean that "it takes a while to save up money for a wedding" but saved up to spend $7k for a chosson watch? $17k between flowers, tablecloths and flooring?

For someone that has lots of money and want to spend it on a comfortable lifestyle, $12k of furniture, $9k of clothing, a $7k watch, $17k of gifts and a $15k shabbos sheva brachos are all nice luxuries to have; but for anyone who's trying to work on cutting down the costs of marrying off their children, those are not necessities, they're luxuries.

People who carry credit card debt can buy cheap furniture. People who have no savings can buy a linens and towels for $1,000 instead of $6,500. People who live paycheck to paycheck can furnish their young couple's apartment for less than $17k. These items are simply not what people in these economic class can afford.

Please tell me that these cases are not an accurate representation of what most people spend.

/end rant

TLDR: If the cases presented by Mishpacha are an accurate representation of what Klal Yisroel spends, then on top of a 250-person wedding campaign I think we have to work on understanding necessities and luxuries.

April 21, 2020, 09:41:56 PM
Re: Antisemitism related to Coronavirus
I guess someone does understand.
We all understand. It's OK if a Jew wants to be extra careful and take unnecessary precautions just to appease anti Semites. It's a free country. But it's anti Semitic for someone else to expect that of a Jew, and anti Semitic to blame a Jew for anti semitism for not appeasing anti Semites.


April 22, 2020, 09:54:45 AM
Re: Is this the ultimate RESET - will states be allowed to declare bankruptcy?
So basically stick it the workers while we give trillions to bail out businesses. The feds need to bailout the states just like they are bailing out everyone else.
Spoken like a true pensioner.
And who will bail out the Feds?

April 22, 2020, 02:34:52 PM
Re: Delta to tlv opening May 8
Do you not realize how many people in the Jewish/Yeshiva world rely on you for airline news and donít really know much else.
I just wish all these thousands of readers would also have signed the petition @Dan set up to help all of us travelers. It's embarrassing how few signatures it got considering how many readers he has. People put up with so much anguish and frustration due to airlines lack of accountability, and by taking about 20-40 seconds to sign a petition, they could have brought all these powerful arguments to the attention of the proper authorities. (No, 1,706 signatures is not enough to attract attention to even read his post) We kvech and complain all the time about airlines bullying and nickel and diming, but when there's an opportunity to act, suddenly everyone was AWOL.

(I know I went a bit off topic, but you mentioned his thousands of readers etc. and this thread anyway went offtopic so I decided to unload this here...)

April 22, 2020, 07:38:55 PM
Re: Couples Stuck in USA - Rent on Israeli Apartments
What i believe OP is asking.
If He's the landlord of an apartment in Israel renting it out to an American couple that flew in for pesach and now can't fly back. What happens to rent if a lease was singed?
Why would they not have to pay?

April 22, 2020, 08:48:34 PM
Re: Calculating The Actual Fatality Rate
Sure feels that way even without citation. Every second person had some symptoms. Will not be surprised that its higher than that. Exposure was definitely higher than that. Just look at the numbers from the one New Rochelle case.

IMHO, this narrative is sooo dangerous to the Tri-state Jewish communities. It breeds a false sense of security, where terms like "herd immunity" are bandied about. Without real numbers, the potential for a second wave devastating those communities is huge. Everyone's walking around feeling like they're Superman, because "I couldn't smell for 3 months!" and "My whole family had it, including my relative who on a vent." IMO, that false sense of security is more dangerous than not knowing anything about it to begin with.

April 23, 2020, 02:39:18 PM
Re: Tehillim for people with corona virus
If someone can add my wife to the wiki
Sara Adel (pronounced Uh-del) bas Chana Leah who is currently on a ventilator it would be appreciated
חסדי ה' after 12+ days on ventilator my wife has!! been extubated

April 23, 2020, 02:57:24 PM
Re: Is there any good news in the fight against COVID-19?
חסדי ה' after 12+ days on ventilator my wife has!! been extubated

April 23, 2020, 03:04:09 PM