Over The Top Purim Parties

[Dan]

If only that was the issue. Again, you probably never read the letter or don't care about what it said. It was about wild Purim parties that were dangerous, and more. I hope that isn't difficult to comprehend.

Maybe you wrote the article as you are just as confused about pointing out what exactly you are outraged about.

[Dan]

Pure suburban Clevelander soul.. You sure have no image intentions.. but here in the "city" (Brooklyn,Lakewood etc) there is surely an image factor of driving a Tesla when the rest of the people didn't gave up yet the Siennas and Oddesys..

My wife drives a 6 year old Ody and it's a very practical family car and will hopefully last another 6 years. But it also happens to cost more than a Model 3.

Maybe in NYC you can get away with sharing one car, but you certainly can't OOT.

[mmgfarb]

If only that was the issue. Again, you probably never read the letter or don't care about what it said. It was about wild Purim parties that were dangerous, and more. I hope that isn't difficult to comprehend.

I did read the letter, if you want to pick which of the "problems" mentioned in the article you actual care about we can address them. So far I think we've established that other people's money isn't your business but that you still think it is.

[Dan]

@Dan could I redeem my HT for a DO in your tesla?

You can redeem 0 HTs for a free 8 day rental directly from Tesla

Last time I loaned out my car it came back totaled 

[Shkop]

Maybe you wrote the article as you are just as confused about pointing out what exactly you are outraged about.

Haha. Strike and a miss. Never wrote it.
I didn't find the letter confusing. It was actually pretty straightforward.

[Dan]

Haha. Strike and a miss. Never wrote it.
I didn't find the letter confusing. It was actually pretty straightforward.

Good lord. http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=tongue+in+cheek

As I said before, the letter conflates multiple issues. Therefore it's not effective.

Good night sir.

[Shkop]

I did read the letter, if you want to pick which of the "problems" mentioned in the article you actual care about we can address them.

Ok so have at it. Here are two of the paragraphs from the article. I bolded some of the problems. Feel free to address them.

One party in the Ir Hatorah of Lakewood, a party that likely cost around $250,000 (including a full band, massive tent, multiple superstar singers, tons and tons of food, open bars) caused more damage than any possible good. Taaruvos galore, with boys and girls mingling all over the nearby streets.

At a different Shul party, Hatzolah had to be there so many times it is not possible to count. One kid after the next was carried out, as children of all ages managed to get toasted on all types of hard liquor. Of course, the wonderful Baalei Batim of this Shul were writing checks while the 13 year old boys got hammered on as much liquor as they wanted.

[mmgfarb]

As I said before, the letter conflates multiple issues. Therefore it's not effective.

Agreed

[eyj]

Good lord. http://www.lmgtfy.com/?q=tongue+in+cheek

As I said before, the letter conflates multiple issues. Therefore it's not effective.

Good night sir.

After reading this thread I have to say the letter writer missed the main issue: social media. Before the days of WhatsApp and online forums, only yentas and those with their noses in everyone else’s business would know or care what someone else in a different social circle spent on his purim party. Today it’s everyone else’s business to discuss, analyze , and write letters to complain about. I wish it were still the 1990’s so I would have my 20 wasted minutes back.

[Moshe123]

Thanks for the popcorn.

[yitzgar]

Ok so have at it. Here are two of the paragraphs from the article. I bolded some of the problems. Feel free to address them.

One party in the Ir Hatorah of Lakewood, a party that likely cost around $250,000 (including a full band, massive tent, multiple superstar singers, tons and tons of food, open bars) caused more damage than any possible good. Taaruvos galore, with boys and girls mingling all over the nearby streets.

At a different Shul party, Hatzolah had to be there so many times it is not possible to count. One kid after the next was carried out, as children of all ages managed to get toasted on all types of hard liquor. Of course, the wonderful Baalei Batim of this Shul were writing checks while the 13 year old boys got hammered on as much liquor as they wanted.

It has already been pointed out many times that there is no reason to blame the 1 percenters for unsupervised kids. If you want to increase awareness of not having alcohol available for teenagers, that is something which is not remotely limited to party throwers, and again, would probably be more effective if parents dealt with their kids about.

[sky121]

Hard to comment on this thread when it's been taken in many different directions.  I agree that focusing on the wealth aspect ruined the article. Hard to know what the writer really has issue with. The drinking and things that go on is a problem every year. In the name of religion we do lots of things year round that I personally don't agree with and many that cause major chillul Hashem. 

In regards to the money aspect- at the end of the day everyone will choose how to spend their money.  My problem with excessive spending is the peer pressure and the standards it seems to cause others the need to follow. And unfortunately people putting themselves in bad positions because of it.


But you're not going to stop people from spending their money.

[sky121]

Jealousy isn't a pretty image. Do you also protest teens mingling at pizza shops on motzash?

The whole concept of worrying about what others spend is just so strange.

Someone in shul this past Shabbos was saying how nobody should spend more than $20 on all their shaluch manos combined as anything more than $20 should be allocated to better causes.

I said I spent $4 each (A box of P"Y Oreo thins and a small bottle of chocolate milk) on 50 that we gave out and don't regret that at all, in fact many people commented how nice it was to having something they weren't going to dump right into the trash while others commented how this was the first time in their life they had ever gotten to eat Oreos.

To which the person responded, but why not allocate the $180 towards tzedaka. I said what I gave to tzedaka is quite frankly none of your business, but I gave generously to many causes on Purim and that the number would be no different had I spent $20 or $200 on Shaluch manos. So why kvetch about what others spend on it?

I actually have no problem with people being reminded about what Purim is all about.  Everyone is free to spend what they want. But the reminding that giving Tzedaka is important and efforts should be put into that too just like mishloach manos is something I think we all could use. That being said, I would never presume to say that specifically to any individual directly assuming I know what that person gives or what he spent on his Mishloach Manos.  You don't know what people give. Or if people already cut back on their spending.

[username]

Ok so have at it. Here are two of the paragraphs from the article. I bolded some of the problems. Feel free to address them.

 Taaruvos galore, with boys and girls mingling all over the nearby streets.

 Hatzolah had to be there so many times it is not possible to count. One kid after the next was carried out, as children of all ages managed to get toasted on all types of hard liquorwhile the 13 year old boys got hammered on as much liquor as they wanted.[/i]

These two issues have NOTHING to do with $250,000 parties. They can and unfortunately do happen even at poshute parties.

[aygart]

I beg to differ.

Here is a small part of the letter:

One party in the Ir Hatorah of Lakewood, a party that likely cost around $250,000 (including a full band, massive tent, multiple superstar singers, tons and tons of food, open bars) caused more damage than any possible good. Taaruvos galore, with boys and girls mingling all over the nearby streets.

At a different Shul party, Hatzolah had to be there so many times it is not possible to count. One kid after the next was carried out, as children of all ages managed to get toasted on all types of hard liquor. Of course, the wonderful Baalei Batim of this Shul were writing checks while the 13 year old boys got hammered on as much liquor as they wanted.

Is there nothing intrinsically wrong with endangering kids so that Hatzolah needs to be called multiple times, boys and girls mingling, and little boys getting toasted on all types of hard liquor? I think there is a lot wrong.

I haven't seen anyone defend the party. Only the rabbonim who you are attacking for not having "banned" it. (I put that in quotes because anyone who uses the word banned in relation to rabbonim has an intrinsic misunderstanding of what rabbonim do)

Your premise is that everything an individual does which is disapproved of should be met with a ban. That is the premise which apparently the rabbonim and roshei yeshiva disagree with you about.

A couple of questions for you.

1. were the amount of people needing the care of Hatzolah more, less, or similar to previous years (adjusted for growth)
2. Was the amount of boys and girls mingling more, less, or similar to previous years (adjusted for growth)

[Yitzshpitz]

I haven't seen anyone defend the party. Only the rabbonim who you are attacking for not having "banned" it. (I put that in quotes because anyone who uses the word banned in relation to rabbonim has an intrinsic misunderstanding of what rabbonim do)

Your premise is that everything an individual does which is disapproved of should be met with a ban. That is the premise which apparently the rabbonim and roshei yeshiva disagree with you about.

@Shkop Also, why does this issue only reflect poorly on the Roshei Yeshiva and the people making the party? How about the parents that are letting their kids go collecting unsupervised and obviously haven't taught them about drinking in moderation? Moreover, even if Roshei yeshivos/Rabbanim "banned" parties, would that really stop people?

A couple of questions for you.

1. were the amount of people needing the care of Hatzolah more, less, or similar to previous years (adjusted for growth)
2. Was the amount of boys and girls mingling more, less, or similar to previous years (adjusted for growth)

People use words like countless and numerous but there arent actual numbers to evaluate the issue.

[gingyguy]

Only because people don't realize that they can go buy one today for $30K. Within a year or 2 at the most, everyone and their mother will have one.

definitely not my mother!

[aygart]

@Shkop  the Roshei Yeshiva and the people making the party?

Wait, there were Roshei Yeshiva making the party?

[yitzgar]

Wait, there were Roshei Yeshiva making the party?

Basically. Let's tar and feather them!

[Yitzshpitz]

Wait, there were Roshei Yeshiva making the party?

Lol. Rabbeim do make parties btw.
My point is that parents will blame Rabbeim/Roshei Yeshivos but wont look at themselves as part pf the problem