Poll

Has the whole stay-at-home situation affected your shalom bayis

Negatively?
8 (9.4%)
Positively?
39 (45.9%)
Status quo
26 (30.6%)
Too early to tell
12 (14.1%)

Total Members Voted: 85

Author Topic: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis  (Read 15303 times)

Offline Lurker

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 5054
  • Total likes: 6390
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 2
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #80 on: April 28, 2020, 12:35:19 PM »
In extreme self-isolation for almost 8 weeks now, including the last 6 weeks of pregnancy and 2 weeks post-partum. Thank G-d I married who I married and I live where I live!
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline username

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2008
  • Posts: 4530
  • Total likes: 602
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 14
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: C Heights
  • Programs: ┌──────────────────┐ │───> Ữ₴ΣЯИΛΜӘ <─── │ └──────────────────┘
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #81 on: April 28, 2020, 01:03:53 PM »
Mazal Tov!

Offline Lurker

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 5054
  • Total likes: 6390
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 2
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #82 on: April 28, 2020, 01:36:55 PM »
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline Naftuli19

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jun 2018
  • Posts: 2721
  • Total likes: 398
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 3
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Not in Quarantine
  • Programs: I wish all...
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #83 on: April 28, 2020, 06:18:40 PM »
Couldn't be better i'm home less and working harder ;D ;D ;D
Sometimes You Will Never Know the True Value of A Moment Until It's Become A Memory...

Offline Kobe Bryant

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2017
  • Posts: 3763
  • Total likes: 2280
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 17
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #84 on: April 29, 2020, 10:45:24 PM »
In extreme self-isolation for almost 8 weeks now, including the last 6 weeks of pregnancy and 2 weeks post-partum. Thank G-d I married who I married and I live where I live!
MT

Offline yesitsme

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Dec 2014
  • Posts: 5020
  • Total likes: 2237
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 4
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #85 on: April 30, 2020, 02:26:16 AM »
as someone who just got engaged id want the relationship to mature a bit before you get married
you gotta change you username, ask r' chaim how to go about it

Offline Luvtotravel

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Dec 2012
  • Posts: 3014
  • Total likes: 131
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 6
    • View Profile
  • Location: Ny
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #86 on: April 30, 2020, 05:28:05 AM »
In extreme self-isolation for almost 8 weeks now, including the last 6 weeks of pregnancy and 2 weeks post-partum. Thank G-d I married who I married and I live where I live!
mazel tov! may i ask how the delivery worked in isolation?
Don't wait for the perfect moment; take the moment and make it perfect.

Offline Lurker

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 5054
  • Total likes: 6390
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 2
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #87 on: April 30, 2020, 11:02:13 AM »
mazel tov! may i ask how the delivery worked in isolation?

The whole thing almost needs it's own TR. Short version, the hospital we used has a self-contained birthing pavilion. One person can come in with the mom, but no re-entry. Mom has to take a rapid Covid test. No nursery, all babies stay in the room with mom. If all is good, they kick you out about 24 hours after birth. If any question of observation is needed, they do not let you leave, as they don't want to take the risk of needed to re-admit anyone. No lactation consultants. Minimal nurse check-ins. I think we saw a nurse 3-4 times during each 12 hour shift. We're in a low Covid exposure area, so I don't know what additional precautions would have been taken otherwise.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline Luvtotravel

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Dec 2012
  • Posts: 3014
  • Total likes: 131
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 6
    • View Profile
  • Location: Ny
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #88 on: May 01, 2020, 03:02:45 PM »
The whole thing almost needs it's own TR. Short version, the hospital we used has a self-contained birthing pavilion. One person can come in with the mom, but no re-entry. Mom has to take a rapid Covid test. No nursery, all babies stay in the room with mom. If all is good, they kick you out about 24 hours after birth. If any question of observation is needed, they do not let you leave, as they don't want to take the risk of needed to re-admit anyone. No lactation consultants. Minimal nurse check-ins. I think we saw a nurse 3-4 times during each 12 hour shift. We're in a low Covid exposure area, so I don't know what additional precautions would have been taken otherwise.
wow. can dad stay?
Don't wait for the perfect moment; take the moment and make it perfect.

Offline dealfinder11

  • Dansdeals Platinum Elite + Lifetime Silver Elite
  • *****
  • Join Date: May 2017
  • Posts: 556
  • Total likes: 305
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #89 on: May 01, 2020, 03:22:30 PM »
as someone who just got engaged id want the relationship to mature a bit before you get married

-1. In the frum world, engagements are necessary evils. Only pros are responsibility and dependability realization setting in, learning necessary halachos (and absorbing them) as well as planning wedding/home. Ask any shadchan/dating coach. There is almost zero benefit for the relationship as it is entirely superficial. To the contrary, there are way too many opportunities to mess things up without having an opportunity to rectify them.

Offline Lurker

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 5054
  • Total likes: 6390
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 2
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #90 on: May 01, 2020, 03:24:21 PM »
wow. can dad stay?

If he's the plus one, yes. But no re-entry if he leaves the building at any point.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline dealfinder11

  • Dansdeals Platinum Elite + Lifetime Silver Elite
  • *****
  • Join Date: May 2017
  • Posts: 556
  • Total likes: 305
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #91 on: May 01, 2020, 03:25:23 PM »
If he's the plus one, yes. But no re-entry if he leaves the building at any point.

Gotta make a decision if you have any kids at home.

Offline Lurker

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 5054
  • Total likes: 6390
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 2
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #92 on: May 01, 2020, 03:29:12 PM »
Gotta make a decision if you have any kids at home.

It wasn't a fun 9th month.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline Kobe Bryant

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2017
  • Posts: 3763
  • Total likes: 2280
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 17
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #93 on: May 06, 2020, 12:27:10 PM »
as someone who just got engaged id want the relationship to mature a bit before you get married

MT

Offline Kobe Bryant

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2017
  • Posts: 3763
  • Total likes: 2280
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 17
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #94 on: May 06, 2020, 12:35:03 PM »
-1. In the frum world, engagements are necessary evils. Only pros are responsibility and dependability realization setting in, learning necessary halachos (and absorbing them) as well as planning wedding/home. Ask any shadchan/dating coach. There is almost zero benefit for the relationship as it is entirely superficial. To the contrary, there are way too many opportunities to mess things up without having an opportunity to rectify them.

Sounds like you are referring to those circles that get engaged on the 4th date, for many people it is an opportunity to deepen their relationship.   

Offline ckmk47

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *********
  • Join Date: Aug 2012
  • Posts: 7961
  • Total likes: 1044
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 3
  • Gender: Female
    • View Profile
  • Location: brooklyn
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #95 on: May 06, 2020, 01:53:12 PM »
Sounds like you are referring to those circles that get engaged on the 4th date, for many people it is an opportunity to deepen their relationship.   
I consider getting married like jumping off a cliff in terms of relationships.
Some people jump from the top.  (1 meeting and no seeing during engagement)
Some people jump from much further down. (lots of seeing each other during engagement)
But it's still a cliff.  Major change from unmarried to married.  Seeing each other endlessly is not going to make a difference.
My favorite cause: cssy.org

Offline aygart

  • Dansdeals Lifetime 10K Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: May 2008
  • Posts: 17395
  • Total likes: 14333
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 14
    • View Profile
    • Lower Watt Energy Brokers
  • Programs: www.lowerwatt.com
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #96 on: May 06, 2020, 05:53:29 PM »
I wonder how many of those pushing for all restrictions to end are affected by this thread.
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline Yard sale

  • Dansdeals Platinum Elite + Lifetime Gold Elite
  • ******
  • Join Date: Jun 2018
  • Posts: 900
  • Total likes: 471
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #97 on: May 06, 2020, 08:24:54 PM »
I wonder how many of those pushing for all restrictions to end are affected by this thread.

If you include kids in “shalom bayis” maybe :)

Offline aygart

  • Dansdeals Lifetime 10K Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: May 2008
  • Posts: 17395
  • Total likes: 14333
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 14
    • View Profile
    • Lower Watt Energy Brokers
  • Programs: www.lowerwatt.com
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #98 on: May 06, 2020, 08:25:56 PM »
If you include kids in “shalom bayis” maybe :)
I am sure it is some without kids too
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline Kobe Bryant

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2017
  • Posts: 3763
  • Total likes: 2280
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 17
    • View Profile
Re: Covid-19 and Shalom Bayis
« Reply #99 on: May 06, 2020, 09:10:28 PM »
I am sure it is some without kids too

And i am sure it hasn't nothing to do with SB.