Humor: Where Is The Line?

[Lurker]

Does humor stigmatize, or does it destigmatize? When is a joke over the line?

[CountValentine]

When is a joke over the line?

How about an example?

[Lurker]

How about an example?

[TimT]

If there’s even a slight possibility of offending any of earth’s 7 billion+ people you’ve crossed the line.

[CountValentine]

No but I can see why some would.

[CountValentine]

How about jokes you thought were funny but now cross the line?
Short bus jokes.

[Lurker]

How about jokes you thought were funny but now cross the line?
Short bus jokes.

Funny doesn't mean it doesn't cross a line. I think the determining factor is whether the joke inclusive or divisive. It can serve to normalize and destigmatize, or it can serve to divide and ostracize. It's very much subjective on the wording of the joke and the setting.

[aygart]

I am posting from my experience. From the results here it a fairly obvious that the OCD cleanliness memes are an obstacle to treatment for those in whom it affects other aspects of life.

https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=ocd+not+about+cleaning

[Lurker]

I'm also posting from experience, but we probably are coming from different angles. I'm guessing you're involved with people who are trying to get their loved ones help. My friends are those loved ones, and they're usually the people who send me this type of humor. There is a line, but I don't think this crossed it.

Nope, I have dealt with both. Consering one of the common strategies used in CBT, I would consider those treated the most likely to be sharing such humor. That doesn't change the difficulty it creates in getting those with OCD affecting other aspects of life to get proper treatment.

If it's helpful to some and harmful to others, where is the line?

[aygart]

If it's helpful to some and harmful to others, where is the line?

It is helpful to them to say it but not to hear it. Somewhat like AAs using the N word (not a great analogy)

[Lurker]

It is helpful to them to say it but not to hear it. Somewhat like AAs using the N word (not a great analogy)

(Definitely the wrong analogy.)

I've found humor like this to spark real conversations and help people open up to others about their struggles, which brought more understanding, sensitivity, and inclusiveness.

[Yehuda57]

Anyone who has read anything I've written here knows I struggle with this line all the time. Just this week a large organization asked me to write a catchy slogan for a fundraising campaign, and my favorite, which also made the client immediately react positively, was nixed because it was deemed "offensive", even though there was no person or group that it made fun of directly.

Heightened sensitivity is a good thing, IMO. Are you losing that much by not posting that OCD joke? The organization used a different slogan. It's not as catchy, but it will do, and they won't have anyone in shul shaking their heads at the (even slight) distaste.

[YitzyS]

Although I thankfully don't suffer from OCD, I have family members and others who I'm very close to, and love very much, who suffer from it. Making such a joke is not the same as having a laugh at their expense, as it was not intended to offend, it does not cost them anything, and it does nothing to increase the stigma.

I am overweight, and have have no issues with people making fun of overweight people. Silly jokes that were not meant to be offensive should not offend people.

What I DON'T like are people who get offended when they shouldn't, as I see those people as a driving force that is currently threatening my democracy.

[aygart]

I fully understand that the intent was not to offend them. I have been told by some who specialize in exclusively CBT for OCD that the first comment they get from patients with OCD causing them to impulsively buy what they can't affordis "But I don't wash my hands all day"

[YitzyS]

I think you will have a hand time finding clear guidelines to answer this question, and to err on the side of caution is NOT an across the board solution.

I think that most people can judge things in their heads, by weighing in a number of factors. These factors would include whether the person has animosity towards the target of the joke, whether the joke was intended to offend, if it is broadly accepted that the subject matter is offensive (which would indicate that it was intentional), if it is about something that is legitimately embarrassing, if it was about an individual (more offensive) or a group of people (IMO less offensive), and so many other factors.

I think that 90 percent of jokes would get a unanimous vote on offensive or not, because most GOOD HEARTED people will be able to properly gauge if a joke is offensive. The other 10 percent are in the gray area, and different GOOD HEARTED people will perceive it differently.

That being said, there are many perfectly acceptable jokes that some people scream about and it makes businesses be overcautious, not because they think they are offending anyone, but because they are afraid it will harm their income.

[YitzyS]

I fully understand that the intent was not to offend them. I have been told by some who specialize in exclusively CBT for OCD that the first comment they get from patients with OCD causing them to impulsively buy what they can't affordis "But I don't wash my hands all day"

So a more accurate response could've been, "Your joke is a stereotype that is not accurate, although many people don't know it."

I do care about what I post, and I would not post something that I think is offensive. I was simply unaware that misinformation about OCD is rampant.

[Yehuda57]

The "political correctness is destroying democracy" is stretching things just as much as the people stretching political correctness are.

[Lurker]

Heightened sensitivity is a good thing, IMO. Are you losing that much by not posting that OCD joke?

I agree with the general sentiment, but I think it's too broad. There is such a thing as overly-heightened sensitivity, IMO. I also believe that humor is a crucial tool in starting important conversations and destigmatizing many things. There will always be people who are offended by things. The fact that we all know what "microaggressions" are is a testament to the consequences of over-sensitivity.

[YitzyS]

The "political correctness is destroying democracy" is stretching things just as much as the people stretching political correctness are.

I strongly disagree with the comparison. I'm actually offended by it.

[yungermanchik]

The "political correctness is destroying democracy" is stretching things just as much as the people stretching political correctness are.

+1000
In addition, the issur ona'as devarim existed long before PC or democracy.