Reactivating because I think it's an important topic.
Even if someone doesn't get there all the way to retire by 40 or w/e, halfway to FIRE is way better than the average family is doing.
I think now that remote work has become so much more common, and free/cheap courses available to obtain qualification for decent jobs that don't require college degrees even, it's a lot more practical for a frum woman to have solid income too without having to drop it as soon as she gets close to having her first baby.
Let's say 2 spouses starting off earning 40-60k each, and living off 40k, can put away serious money for a good few years before the outrageous tuition bills come in. By that time salaries should be increasing enough to cover tuition even if they can't save as much. Investments should be approaching critical mass where even if they're not adding to the pile, it can grow to FI numbers in 10-15 years (coast FI is the term for that).
If they move to cheap places and/or with vouchers, they can accelerate that. It's all about priorities, and getting the big decisions right- not making yourself crazy over every dollar.