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I created an account to say this

I am a survivor of abuse

I tried to type up a longer, more detailed post but it got too hard. The bottom line is the following

There's no such thing as universal feelings, reactions, desires, needs that all victims share. Each one is an individual who suffered alone and carries the unique scars that stay with them and each one will react to future situations in life in their own way.

Therefore, there is no single response to abuse that will leave all victims feeling safe, secure, validated, supported, closure and everything else all the well meaning people here want to give them.

However, I think there is a single response that would leave all victims feeling further pain and trauma and that is "It can't be."

Rabbi Shimon Russell - How to Safeguard and Protect our Children

https://youtu.be/fefqSvXf0JI


« Last edited by Yehuda57 on January 12, 2022, 05:44:00 PM »

Author Topic: Chaim Walder dies  (Read 123366 times)

Offline A3

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« Last Edit: December 27, 2021, 09:03:09 AM by AsherO »

Offline JMHO

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2021, 07:15:23 AM »
Does not deserve to RIP.
Why not?

Offline aygart

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2021, 08:51:17 AM »
Why not?
ואת דמכם מנפשותיכם אדרוש
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline LNS

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2021, 08:53:57 AM »
wow

Offline JMHO

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #4 on: December 27, 2021, 08:55:47 AM »
ואת דמכם מנפשותיכם אדרוש
Were the allegations proven in court or are we judging?

Offline yitzgar

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #5 on: December 27, 2021, 08:56:25 AM »
Were the allegations proven in court or are we judging?
He is referring to suicide

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #6 on: December 27, 2021, 08:57:07 AM »
Paging at @AsherO
Here we go.  :)
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Offline AsherO

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #7 on: December 27, 2021, 08:59:36 AM »
Paging at @AsherO
Here we go.  :)

Next time please use RTM

Feel free to suggest alternative topic names for these BDE/RIP breakaways
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Offline AsherO

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #8 on: December 27, 2021, 09:02:03 AM »
He is referring to suicide

As far as I know we go to great lengths not to presume suicide (halachically).
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Offline aygart

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #9 on: December 27, 2021, 09:02:03 AM »
Next time please use RTM

Feel free to suggest alternative topic names for these BDE/RIP breakaways
Just the name by itself or "________ Dies"
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline aygart

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #10 on: December 27, 2021, 09:02:45 AM »
As far as I know we go to great lengths not to presume suicide (halachically).

For the purpose of allowing kever yisroel and possibly aveilus.
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline zh cohen

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #11 on: December 27, 2021, 09:13:39 AM »
Were the allegations proven in court or are we judging?

FWIU, while the allegations that most recently surfaced had not yet been verified by a court, it was apparently confirmed by a (or perhaps several) Beis Din that he violated אשת איש.

Offline Mf1

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Re: Re: RIP/BDE Master Thread
« Reply #12 on: December 27, 2021, 09:18:04 AM »
FWIU, while the allegations that most recently surfaced had not yet been verified by a court, it was apparently confirmed by a (or perhaps several) Beis Din that he violated אשת איש.
source?

Offline Euclid

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Offline as2

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #14 on: December 27, 2021, 09:28:08 AM »
The man is dead. Let Gd sort out the specifics at this point.
Memories last forever, make them while you can.

Offline AsherO

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #15 on: December 27, 2021, 09:33:25 AM »
The man is dead. Let Gd sort out the specifics at this point.

Funny you say that considering your OP. Why limit the specifics to g-d, let g-d sort it all out and pray for his soul (which is the only part that lives on) to find peace (through whatever process determined by the Heavenly Court). His soul didn’t sin, it was trapped in a body that did.
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Offline as2

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #16 on: December 27, 2021, 09:36:54 AM »
Funny you say that considering your OP. Why limit the specifics to g-d, let g-d sort it all out and pray for his soul (which is the only part that lives on) to find peace (through whatever process determined by the Heavenly Court). His soul didn’t sin, it was trapped in a body that did.
I meant as far as what he did or didn't do. He can't defend himself, and court can't be held. There is no reason to discuss details of accusations at this point.


If the man was innocent, I pray this was an atonement for him. If he wasn't, I hope he got what he deserved.


Also, I was not OP. 



Memories last forever, make them while you can.

Offline YitzyS

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #17 on: December 27, 2021, 09:48:03 AM »
Feel free to suggest alternative topic names for these BDE/RIP breakaways
I think we should just make an official policy that NO discussion is allowed in the RIP/BDE thread, and ANY talk MUST be in a new thread.

Two points:
1. You can add "deaths" to the title ("BDE/RIP/Deaths") so that people don't feel a need to comment, or you can just leave it as is and we can all be mature.
2. I don't think a master thread should be created for "non-respectable people who died," as it would be an invitation for posthumous badmouthing, and also, it's hard to conflate all wrongdoing into a unified thread. Let people make new threads for each person if they think it's important enough to talk negatively about them after their death.

Offline yitzgar

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #18 on: December 27, 2021, 09:49:11 AM »


if they think it's important enough to talk negatively about them after their death.

This

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Chaim Walder RIP?
« Reply #19 on: December 27, 2021, 09:57:14 AM »
I think we should just make an official policy that NO discussion is allowed in the RIP/BDE thread, and ANY talk MUST be in a new thread.
We see many times comments like: I knew this great person, or this person dedicated his life to helping others. I see nothing wrong with that. If you want to discuss if the person was a racist, anti-semite or many other things then take it to another thread.
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