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Author Topic: Best one-liners  (Read 202259 times)

Offline jj1000

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #300 on: May 24, 2013, 08:01:24 PM »
Quote from: nafnaf12 on May 24, 2013, 07:49:59 PM

I'd rather have an enemy who slaps me in the face, than a friend who stabs me in the back.
I'd also rather be slapped than stabbed...
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Offline SamKey

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #301 on: May 25, 2013, 05:13:55 PM »
Quote from: jj1000 on May 24, 2013, 08:01:24 PM
I'd also rather be slapped than stabbed...
+1 ALOL
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Offline Columbiadorm

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #302 on: May 26, 2013, 10:43:25 PM »
There are two types of people who come late to work: 1. The boss. 2. The person who will never be the boss.
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Offline DovtheBear

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #303 on: May 26, 2013, 10:44:41 PM »
Quote from: Columbiadorm on May 26, 2013, 10:43:25 PM
There are two types of people who come late to work: 1. The boss. 2. The person who will never be the boss.
There are 2 types of people: those who took a shower today and those who didn't. :P
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Offline nafnaf12

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #304 on: May 26, 2013, 11:03:43 PM »
Their are two types of people
Ones the pee in the shower and ones that lie about it :)
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Offline Chaikel

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #305 on: May 27, 2013, 07:43:57 AM »
Posted on IDF FB page:
Muslims want to meet Allah, the IDF is the Make a Wish Foundation of the Middle East.
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Offline nafnaf12

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #306 on: May 27, 2013, 10:06:31 PM »
if there was an award for laziness i would send  someone to get it for me
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Offline theberk

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #307 on: June 02, 2013, 12:49:09 AM »
Seen in a store window:
If you're here and we're not, think of all the times we're here and you're not.
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Offline chaimmayer

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #308 on: June 02, 2013, 10:22:08 AM »
Quote from: theberk on June 02, 2013, 12:49:09 AM
Seen in a store window:
If you're here and we're not, think of all the times we're here and you're not.
only a חצי נחמה
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #309 on: June 02, 2013, 11:21:19 AM »
Quote from: chaimmayer on June 02, 2013, 10:22:08 AM
only a חצי נחמה
Which reminds me of this one:

צרת רבים, נחמת שוטים

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Offline chaimmayer

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #310 on: June 02, 2013, 12:09:16 PM »
Quote from: Achas Veachas on June 02, 2013, 11:21:19 AM
Which reminds me of this one:

צרת רבים, נחמת שוטים
there's a חז״ל  (actually it's probably made up but reb elchonon wasserman (who אור אלחנן is named after) quotes it and says a פשט ) that   The  פסוק says שלמה המלך was חכם מכל אדם and the drasha is מכל אדם אפילו מן השוטים
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #311 on: June 03, 2013, 09:41:01 AM »
I'm not sexist. Being sexist is wrong and being wrong is only for women.
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Online Something Fishy

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #312 on: June 03, 2013, 10:40:15 AM »
There are 10 types of people in the world: these who understand binary and these who don't.
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #313 on: June 03, 2013, 10:56:05 AM »
Quote from: Something Fishy on June 03, 2013, 10:40:15 AM
There are 10 types of people in the world: these who understand binary and these who don't.
There are actually 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary, these who don't and computer programmers who consider 0 to also be a bit.
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #314 on: June 03, 2013, 10:59:02 AM »
Why do mathematicians confuse Halloween and Christmas?
Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec.
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Offline george

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #315 on: June 03, 2013, 12:55:47 PM »
There are two types of people in the world and I don't like them.

:P
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Offline SamKey

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #316 on: June 03, 2013, 01:51:39 PM »

Quote from: Something Fishy on June 03, 2013, 10:40:15 AM
There are 10 types of people in the world: these who understand binary and these who don't.
repost
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Offline meshugener

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #317 on: June 07, 2013, 01:59:38 AM »
הבטחתי, אבל לא הבטחתי לקיים ~ יצחק שמיר
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Offline Ergel

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #318 on: June 07, 2013, 09:01:01 AM »
Quote from: meshugener on June 07, 2013, 01:59:38 AM
הבטחתי, אבל לא הבטחתי לקיים ~ יצחק שמיר
that's awesome
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #319 on: June 07, 2013, 10:02:19 AM »
Quote from: meshugener on June 07, 2013, 01:59:38 AM
הבטחתי, אבל לא הבטחתי לקיים ~ יצחק שמיר
That goes for every politician.
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