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Author Topic: Best one-liners  (Read 202083 times)

Offline DovtheBear

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #320 on: June 07, 2013, 05:49:10 PM »
Quote from: Achas Veachas on June 07, 2013, 10:02:19 AM
That goes for every politician.
But he was truthful about it.
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Offline Dan

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #321 on: June 10, 2013, 03:03:55 PM »
"What's the difference between the US government and husbands?
The government is listening to you."
-Shmuel Tennenhaus
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Offline CountValentine

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #322 on: June 10, 2013, 03:13:07 PM »
Quote from: meshugener on June 07, 2013, 01:59:38 AM
הבטחתי, אבל לא הבטחתי לקיים ~ יצחק שמיר
?
Google fails again.  >:(
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Offline Ergel

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #323 on: June 10, 2013, 03:16:25 PM »
Quote from: CountValentine on June 10, 2013, 03:13:07 PM
?
Google fails again.  >:(
I promised, but I didn't promise to keep my promise (its less cumbersome in the original)
Yitzchak shamir

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Offline CountValentine

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #324 on: June 10, 2013, 03:19:33 PM »
Quote from: Ergel on June 10, 2013, 03:16:25 PM
I promised, but I didn't promise to keep my promise (its less cumbersome in the original)
Yitzchak shamir
TY. Google did get one part right.
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Offline Ergel

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #325 on: June 11, 2013, 02:43:58 PM »
Quote from: mancunian on May 30, 2010, 05:03:36 AM
בשעה שאמר הקב"ה לי הכסף ולי הזהב באו ישראל ואמרו אני לדודי ודודי לי
was just quoted from another thread. Awesome
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Offline citiguy

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #326 on: June 11, 2013, 04:01:54 PM »
The golden rule is, those with the gold rule
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Offline YSP

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #327 on: June 12, 2013, 12:17:00 PM »
Quote from: citiguy on June 11, 2013, 04:01:54 PM
The golden rule is, those with the gold rule

Slightly different variation. The golden rule is that those with the gold make the rules
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Offline yehuda S

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #328 on: June 12, 2013, 06:47:30 PM »
You're not fat, you're just.. easier to see.
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Online jj1000

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #329 on: June 13, 2013, 10:51:40 AM »
If a man speaks in a forest and no women hears him, is he still wrong?
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Offline AJK

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #330 on: June 13, 2013, 11:41:37 AM »
Quote from: jj1000 on June 13, 2013, 10:51:40 AM
If a man speaks in a forest and no women hears him, is he still wrong?

Hahaha.
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Offline yehuda S

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #331 on: June 13, 2013, 08:47:42 PM »
"We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like."—Jean Cocteau
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Offline Moishebatchy

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #332 on: June 14, 2013, 03:20:44 AM »
Quote from: jj1000 on June 13, 2013, 10:51:40 AM
If a man speaks in a forest and no women hears him, is he still wrong?

...says the man soon to be contemplating marriage. :P
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Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #333 on: June 18, 2013, 11:41:40 AM »
I find it hard to believe the NSA is reading my emails, even I don't read them...
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Online jj1000

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #334 on: June 20, 2013, 12:03:57 PM »
"[R]easonable men cannot differ on what is logical although logical men may differ on what is reasonable." Firestone v. Time, Inc., 271 So.2d 745, 751 (Florida 1972)
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Offline SamKey

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #335 on: June 20, 2013, 01:12:29 PM »
Quote from: jj1000 on June 20, 2013, 12:03:57 PM
"[R]easonable men cannot differ on what is logical although logical men may differ on what is reasonable." Firestone v. Time, Inc., 271 So.2d 745, 751 (Florida 1972)
For the ethics thread? :P
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Offline Dan

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #336 on: June 20, 2013, 06:38:25 PM »
"Proverbs: When a Jew blows himself up he's granted 72 mother-in-laws."

-Mendy Pellin
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Offline Moishebatchy

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #337 on: June 20, 2013, 07:05:12 PM »
Quote from: Dan on June 20, 2013, 06:38:25 PM
"Proverbs: When a Jew blows himself up he's granted 72 mother-in-laws."

-Mendy Pellin

LOL... reminds me of this one: "Whatever you do, don't die a virgin... there are terrorists waiting up there for you!" ;D
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Offline AJK

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #338 on: June 20, 2013, 08:25:53 PM »
Hahaha.
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Offline Dan

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #339 on: June 27, 2013, 07:13:43 PM »
It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
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