Author Topic: Best one-liners  (Read 200458 times)

Offline Myccrabbi

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #460 on: October 05, 2013, 10:54:57 PM »
Beauty may only be skin deep, but ugliness is definitely through an through  ;D
which reminds me of the exchange between a man and a women W: u r drunk M: wen I wake up tomorrow ill b sober wen u wake up tomorrow u still b ugly W: (deeply insulted) if u would b my husband I would put poison in ur tea M: if u would b my wife I would drink it!!!!

If u work for a living, why kill urself working?

Offline Myccrabbi

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #461 on: October 05, 2013, 10:57:48 PM »
If u work for a living y kill urself working :)

If u work for a living, why kill urself working?

Offline YOSEF

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #462 on: October 05, 2013, 11:06:27 PM »
which reminds me of the exchange between a man and a women W: u r drunk M: wen I wake up tomorrow ill b sober wen u wake up tomorrow u still b ugly W: (deeply insulted) if u would b my husband I would put poison in ur tea M: if u would b my wife I would drink it!!!!


Oy.
Lady Astor and Winston Churchill.

Offline Myccrabbi

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #463 on: October 05, 2013, 11:08:05 PM »
Oy.
Lady Astor and Winston Churchill.
yup :D

If u work for a living, why kill urself working?

Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #464 on: October 09, 2013, 05:39:10 PM »

Offline sky121

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #465 on: October 09, 2013, 05:41:01 PM »
"Not all who wander are lost"

Offline DovtheBear

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #466 on: October 13, 2013, 04:23:22 PM »
If I owned a Hashgacha company I'd call it "protis" just to confuse people. 

"What's the Hashgacha?"
"protis"
"huh?!"

-Mendy Pellin
"להסתובב זה לא אומר להיות חופשי"

Offline hocker

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #467 on: October 13, 2013, 09:06:42 PM »
שמחה גדולה להיות במצוה תמיד!

Offline Galitzyaner

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #468 on: October 13, 2013, 10:02:12 PM »
!מתחילים מבראשית ואם לא נח אז לך לך

Offline churnbabychurn

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #469 on: October 13, 2013, 10:34:25 PM »
I pray for a future where there is complete equality across the globe, and also free shipping.

Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #470 on: October 14, 2013, 12:42:01 PM »
Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

Offline Moishebatchy

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #471 on: October 14, 2013, 06:33:51 PM »
I pray for a future where there is complete equality across the globe, and also free shipping.

Like! :)

Offline ckmk47

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #472 on: October 14, 2013, 11:00:23 PM »
Lack of direction is the problem...not lack of time.
We all have the same 24 hours each day.


Impossible only means you haven't found the solution yet.

My favorite cause: cssy.org

Offline yuneeq

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #473 on: October 15, 2013, 02:41:37 PM »
Just heard this one

משנכנס אב, ממעטין בשמחה

HT: itsyehuda ;)
Visibly Jewish

Offline Achas Veachas

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #474 on: October 15, 2013, 02:45:40 PM »
Just heard this one

משנכנס אב, ממעטין בשמחה

HT: itsyehuda ;)
???
מסכת תענית דף כו עמוד ב

Offline yuneeq

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #475 on: October 15, 2013, 02:56:47 PM »
???
מסכת תענית דף כו עמוד ב

Yup. The HT should give the joke away, if not for the fact that I'm the one who just heard it ;)
« Last Edit: October 15, 2013, 03:00:59 PM by yuneeq »
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Offline yuneeq

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #476 on: October 17, 2013, 01:27:54 PM »
The most dangerous side-effect of smoking cannabis is getting arrested, and having your life ruined by a needless prison sentence.
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Offline SamKey

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #477 on: October 17, 2013, 03:57:22 PM »
The most dangerous side-effect of smoking cannabis is getting arrested, and having your life ruined by a needless prison sentence.
yeah I hate when that happens!

Offline Chaikel

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #478 on: October 18, 2013, 09:10:14 AM »
You can't make this up.

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Offline DovtheBear

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Re: Best one-liners
« Reply #479 on: October 19, 2013, 10:13:44 PM »
"להסתובב זה לא אומר להיות חופשי"