Author Topic: Best one-liners (Read 202742 times)

Super Speed · « **Reply #660 on:** August 03, 2014, 06:36:27 PM »

If I had a flower for every time you made me smile and laugh,
I'd have a garden to walk in forever, so thank you!

DovtheBear · « **Reply #661 on:** August 04, 2014, 03:40:35 AM »

Quote from: Super Speed on August 03, 2014, 06:36:27 PM

If I had a flower for every time you made me smile and laugh,
I'd have a garden to walk in forever, so thank you!

I have allergies.

Achas Veachas · « **Reply #662 on:** August 14, 2014, 03:27:28 PM »

Don't you hate it when you make a meaningful,
well-thought out quote and the only reason no
one likes it is because you quoted yourself? - Me

(well technically I saw it on twitter but... you get it)

Mordyk · « **Reply #663 on:** August 14, 2014, 03:40:26 PM »

Quote from: Achas Veachas on August 14, 2014, 03:27:28 PM

Don't you hate it when you make a meaningful,
well-thought out quote and the only reason no
one likes it is because you quoted yourself? - Me

(well technically I saw it on twitter but... you get it)

you ruined it with this
"(well technically I saw it on twitter but... you get it)"

etech0 · « **Reply #664 on:** August 14, 2014, 03:45:50 PM »

The problem with the rat race is that even if you win the race, you're still a rat.

MC · « **Reply #665 on:** August 19, 2014, 06:21:32 PM »

"My Merrill Lynch account can't keep up with my wife's Neiman Marcus." -my boss

Super Speed · « **Reply #666 on:** August 19, 2014, 06:26:44 PM »

Don't sweat the petty and don't pet the sweaty.

DovtheBear · « **Reply #667 on:** August 20, 2014, 01:43:52 PM »

Quote from: etech0 on August 14, 2014, 03:45:50 PM

The problem with the rat race is that even if you win the race, you're still a rat.

etech0 · « **Reply #668 on:** August 21, 2014, 12:32:38 PM »

Sometimes the customer is right. But sometimes the customer is just plain confused.

Novo · « **Reply #669 on:** August 21, 2014, 12:34:03 PM »

Quote from: etech0 on August 21, 2014, 12:32:38 PM

Sometimes the customer is right. But sometimes the customer is just plain confused.

Probably "happened in your office today"

etech0 · « **Reply #670 on:** August 21, 2014, 12:43:54 PM »

Quote from: Novo on August 21, 2014, 12:34:03 PM

Probably "happened in your office today"

Not today... but often enough!

Super Speed · « **Reply #671 on:** August 21, 2014, 06:47:08 PM »

Quote from: etech0 on August 21, 2014, 12:43:54 PM

Not today... but often enough!

Time for a new job?

etech0 · « **Reply #672 on:** August 21, 2014, 07:38:36 PM »

Quote from: Super Speed on August 21, 2014, 06:47:08 PM

Time for a new job?

Na, these stories are what we laugh about together. The staff (for the most part) are great to work with. The customers are often not so savvy though...

This reminds me:

DovtheBear · « **Reply #673 on:** August 28, 2014, 05:27:31 PM »

"Instagram is down. We will post pictures of our lunch once it is back up." -PzFeed

Achas Veachas · « **Reply #674 on:** August 28, 2014, 05:29:07 PM »

Yosel · « **Reply #675 on:** August 29, 2014, 04:02:25 PM »

You will never reach your destination if you
stop and throw stones at every dog that barks.

ushdadude · « **Reply #676 on:** September 11, 2014, 01:13:25 PM »

Worry is the misuse of your imagination

etech0 · « **Reply #677 on:** September 11, 2014, 01:13:55 PM »

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up

sky121 · « **Reply #678 on:** September 14, 2014, 06:12:17 PM »

"Your beliefs don't make you a better person, your behavior does."

Sport · « **Reply #679 on:** September 14, 2014, 09:02:10 PM »

"Being lost is never a matter of not knowing where you are; it’s a matter of not knowing where you aren’t."