Ok, this is embarrassing.
I missed the deadline for the spend on this card, even though I did spend 3600 on it in about 5 months instead of 4. I asked if they'd give me something anyway, and they were all snarky and said no.
Has anyone ever gotten the bonus by asking for it after missing the deadline? If anyone has, then I'll call them every 10 minutes until they give it to me.