Author Topic: Jokes Master Thread (Read 719453 times)

meshugener · « **Reply #1140 on:** February 15, 2014, 10:55:12 PM »

Quote from: jj1000 on February 15, 2014, 09:14:33 PM

Q. What is Meshuganers favorite fruit?

Strawberries

JJ is nominated for the 2014 Piggy Award.

As חז"ל said: הבטילה מביאה לידי זנות, it all began with your stupid number counting thread - which was just the result of you and a few others being terribly bored, and yes, now we see the second part.

Crazy tools · « **Reply #1141 on:** February 16, 2014, 12:54:17 AM »

Quote from: Myccrabbi on February 15, 2014, 09:03:23 PM

A man is alone in an airport lounge. A beautiful young woman walks in and sits down at the table next to him.

He decides that because she's wearing a uniform, she's probably an off-duty Flight Attendant.

So he decides to have a go at picking her up by identifying the airline she flies for, thereby impressing her greatly.

He leans across to her and says the British Airways motto, “To fly, to serve”?

The young woman looks at him blankly. He sits back and thinks up another line.

He leans forward again and delivers the Air France motto. “Winning the hearts of the world”?

Again she just stares at him with a slightly puzzled look on her face.

Undeterred he tries again this time saying the Malaysian Airlines motto. “Going beyond expectations”?

The woman looks at him sternly and says, “What the f*ck do you want”?

“Aha”, he says,.................. "Delta Airlines"

Lol

Have you ever seen this though?

Quote from: Myccrabbi on February 15, 2014, 09:03:23 PM

A beautiful young woman ........

............. "Delta Airlines"

Super Speed · « **Reply #1142 on:** February 16, 2014, 01:19:50 AM »

Quote from: meshugener on February 15, 2014, 10:55:12 PM

JJ is nominated for the 2014 Piggy Award.

Didn't I get that award recently?

Saver2000 · « **Reply #1143 on:** February 16, 2014, 01:26:11 AM »

Quote from: jj1000 on February 15, 2014, 09:14:33 PM

Q. What is Meshuganers favorite fruit?

A. A Rapefruit.

meshugener · « **Reply #1144 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:24:14 AM »

Quote from: Saver2000 on February 16, 2014, 01:26:11 AM

Why are you laughing?

ilherman · « **Reply #1145 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:25:39 AM »

Quote from: meshugener on February 16, 2014, 02:24:14 AM

Why are you laughing?

You didn't catch the joke?

CountValentine · « **Reply #1146 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:31:21 AM »

Quote from: ilherman on February 16, 2014, 02:25:39 AM

You didn't catch the joke?

He is not laughing because it is not a joke to him.

ilherman · « **Reply #1147 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:34:06 AM »

Quote from: CountValentine on February 16, 2014, 02:31:21 AM

He is not laughing because it is not a joke to him.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Joe4007 · « **Reply #1148 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:41:27 AM »

Quote from: jj1000 on February 15, 2014, 09:14:33 PM

Q. What is Meshuganers favorite fruit?

A. A Rapefruit.

Yup. He couldn't stop eating it at our last DO.

And do you know what he dips it in?

Molasses.

CountValentine · « **Reply #1149 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:45:16 AM »

Quote from: Joe4007 on February 16, 2014, 02:41:27 AM

Yup. He couldn't stop eating it at our last DO.

And do you know what he dips it in?

Way TMI and this is a family forum.

meshugener · « **Reply #1150 on:** February 16, 2014, 02:55:09 AM »

Quote from: CountValentine on February 16, 2014, 02:45:16 AM

Way TMI and this is a family forum.

which family?

CountValentine · « **Reply #1151 on:** February 16, 2014, 03:08:49 AM »

What’s the difference between a pig and a beautiful woman?

A 12 pack.

Dr Moose · « **Reply #1152 on:** February 16, 2014, 03:15:23 AM »

Tom: "hey Jerry, what's the difference between a shower curtain and toilet paper?"

Jerry: "umm, i don't know."

Tom: "so it was you ...

meshugener · « **Reply #1153 on:** February 16, 2014, 03:21:52 AM »

I'm going to leave DDF if we can't keep it clean.
STOP WITH ALL THESE UGLY, NAUSEATING AND PIGGYISH JOKES!

chucksterace · « **Reply #1154 on:** February 16, 2014, 03:24:53 AM »

Quote from: meshugener on February 16, 2014, 03:21:52 AM

I'm going to leave DDF if we can't keep it clean.
STOP WITH ALL THESE UGLY, NAUSEATING AND PIGGYISH JOKES!

This is why I tried to create the "RATED R" thread a while back. Of course no one was interested in it.

CountValentine · « **Reply #1155 on:** February 16, 2014, 03:26:18 AM »

Quote from: chucksterace on February 16, 2014, 03:24:53 AM

This is why I tried to create the "RATED R" thread a while back. Of course no one was interested in it.

As in "Rape" thread? Mesh would be the only one posting.

DovtheBear · « **Reply #1156 on:** February 18, 2014, 12:22:38 PM »

Lou Bob · « **Reply #1157 on:** February 18, 2014, 12:24:35 PM »

Quote from: DovtheBear on February 18, 2014, 12:22:38 PM

LMS?

ur a little early for it. Or a little late

DovtheBear · « **Reply #1158 on:** February 18, 2014, 07:44:05 PM »

Quote from: Lou Bob on February 18, 2014, 12:24:35 PM

ur a little early for it. Or a little late

Its a joke thread.

good sam · « **Reply #1159 on:** February 19, 2014, 11:44:07 AM »

Quote from: meshugener on February 16, 2014, 03:21:52 AM

I'm going to leave DDF if we can't keep it clean.
STOP WITH ALL THESE UGLY, NAUSEATING AND PIGGYISH JOKES!

Am I the only one who sees an opportunity here?

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Author Topic: Jokes Master Thread (Read 719453 times)