Author Topic: Jokes Master Thread  (Read 513134 times)

Offline SuperFlyer

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@ ashero: it happened to mrs gross or the guy at the door was mr gross?


Someone posted the same joke with a slightly different nussach earlier in this thread.

This happens when you don't pig (chazer)...

Offline Avid Reader

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Someone posted the same joke with a slightly different nussach earlier in this thread.


It was last weeks chullent in the other joke.



This happens when you don't pig (chazer)...

When you don't what??

Offline aussiebochur

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When you don't what??
Revise the thread...

Offline whYME

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Revise the thread...
and by revise I assume you mean review...
(thanks for the explanation though, I totally didn't get it...)

Offline daastorah

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For those of you learning smicha:

A restaurant had a sign "kosher lechol hadeyos"

The entree was pochos mikashiur
The soup-aino ben yomo
The main course-nifsal meachilas kelev
The dessert-noysen taam lefgam
And the bill a hefsed merubo

Offline SuperFlyer

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If I have to explain myself:

If someone doesn't "chazer" the threads they post on, they end up posting something that was written before

Offline SuperFlyer

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Can u spare just $2? Ahmed is a 24yr old muslim man in ramalah. He has one leg, one arm and one eye. Each day he has to ride 7 miles for water along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no brakes and only one pedal. If you send us just $2, we will send you the dvd- its hilarious

Offline YOSEF

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Which pedal and which leg?

Offline Avid Reader

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True story from a cousin of mine:

Just before sunset today, my son was praying the Mincha (afternoon) prayer, reading it from his Ipod. Mohamed's 6 YO D's son walks up to him to say something, my son continues his quiet prayer. My other son explains that he is praying, talking to God.
Mohamed's son: "On the telephone?"
« Last Edit: February 10, 2011, 12:46:24 PM by Avid Reader »

Offline Chaikel

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Egypt's ruling party head said he expects Mubarak to step aside tonight. How epic would it be if he did so in pajamas?
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Offline twentie4hrs

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I need a new rear end because mine has a crack in it
A penny saved is 1 cent

Offline Chaikel

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Create professional looking itineraries.
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Offline Dan

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http://www.didthecavswinlastnight.com/ (sorry, Dan)
Yup, saw that earlier.
I also was at last night's record setting 26th consecutive loss, tied for the most consecutive losses in the history of professional sports.
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Offline moish

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does the owner still think that the cavs will win a championship before the heat?

Offline whYME

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Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait. Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch, he snatched him up again and poured a little beer down his throat. Then he went about his fishing.

An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pant leg. Looking down, he saw the same snake with three more worms in his mouth

Offline smurf

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Having arrived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait. Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no lunch, he snatched him up again and poured a little beer down his throat. Then he went about his fishing.

An hour or so later the fisherman felt a tug at his pant leg. Looking down, he saw the same snake with three more worms in his mouth
sounds like a superbowl beer commercial :)

Offline Dan

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sounds like a superbowl beer commercial :)
+1 :D
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Offline Dan

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Offline yeshivaman

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check it, the cavs won!!!!!
i wish i knew what i was doing...

Offline Avid Reader

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Woman to teenager on the couch: "I don't think that's what the recipe meant by 'chill an hour before serving.'"