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If you actually laugh out loud, write AALOL

http://forums.dansdeals.com/index.php?topic=344.msg1561282#msg1561282
« Last edited by Baruch on September 18, 2016, 09:14:18 PM »

Author Topic: Jokes Master Thread  (Read 407661 times)

Offline PlatinumGuy

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Apple Touch ID. Sponsored by the NSA, CIA and FBI :)
״וזה כלל גדול: שישנא אדם כל דבר שקר. וכל מה שיוסיף שנאה לדרכי השקר יוסיף אהבה לתורה.״ - אורחות צדיקים

Offline yuneeq

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A woman got up from shiva and tells her husband "I learned two things: Shacharis doesn't take only 15 minutes and maariv doesn't take an hour and a half!"

Offline good sam

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A woman got up from shiva and tells her husband "I learned two things: Shacharis doesn't take only 15 minutes and maariv doesn't take an hour and a half!"
ALOL
If you don't care why would you comment?
HT: DMYD

Offline AnonymousUser

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Offline judahk88

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A woman got up from shiva and tells her husband "I learned two things: Shacharis doesn't take only 15 minutes and maariv doesn't take an hour and a half!"
Just saw that one a few days ago. Love it!

Online Moshe123

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דער גאנצער וועלט פיהרט זיך אז איינער טיילט און יעדער נעמט לעקיך ערב יום הקדוש. אין גאליציע איז אבער דער מנהג אז יעדער טיילט לעקיך.
אז ס'איז באשערט צו דארפן חלילה געבן איינעם במשך'ן יאהר זאל מען אפקומען מיט דעם.

Offline Achas Veachas

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דער גאנצער וועלט פיהרט זיך אז איינער טיילט און יעדער נעמט לעקיך ערב יום הקדוש. אין גאליציע איז אבער דער מנהג אז יעדער טיילט לעקיך.
אז ס'איז באשערט צו דארפן חלילה געבן איינעם במשך'ן יאהר זאל מען אפקומען מיט דעם.
;D

Online whYME

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דער גאנצער וועלט פיהרט זיך אז איינער טיילט און יעדער נעמט לעקיך ערב יום הקדוש. אין גאליציע איז אבער דער מנהג אז יעדער טיילט לעקיך.
אז ס'איז באשערט צו דארפן חלילה געבן איינעם במשך'ן יאהר זאל מען אפקומען מיט דעם.
For those who don't understand yiddish, here's what google translate has to say on the matter:
"The world leaders themselves that one part and each takes corpse preparation day holy. In Galicia, however, is the custom that every part body.
That is destined to require far give one for 'N years should come with it."

:)

Offline Achas Veachas

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For those who don't understand yiddish, here's what google translate has to say on the matter:
"The world leaders themselves that one part and each takes corpse preparation day holy. In Galicia, however, is the custom that every part body.
That is destined to require far give one for 'N years should come with it."

:)
Meh. It's better in the original :P

Online Moshe123

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For those who don't understand yiddish, here's what google translate has to say on the matter:
"The world leaders themselves that one part and each takes corpse preparation day holy. In Galicia, however, is the custom that every part body.
That is destined to require far give one for 'N years should come with it."

:)

Lol!

Offline Achas Veachas

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Why is "Lekach" translated corpse/body? :-\

Offline DovtheBear

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Can you give a real translation, please?
"להסתובב זה לא אומר להיות חופשי"

Offline Achas Veachas

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Can you give a real translation, please?
Roughly speaking: The Oilam is noiheg that everyone asks for Lekach Erev YK in case it was decreed on them to beg during the year they should be Yotze with that, however in Galicia (or insert YOUR circles' stingy region here) everyone GIVES Lekah Erev YK in case it was decreed upon them to give in the coming year...

Offline DovtheBear

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Roughly speaking: The Oilam is noiheg that everyone asks for Lekach Erev YK in case it was decreed on them to beg during the year they should be Yotze with that, however in Galicia (or insert YOUR circles' stingy region here) everyone GIVES Lekah Erev YK in case it was decreed upon them to give in the coming year...
Got it!  ;D
(not that I ever heard of it before)
"להסתובב זה לא אומר להיות חופשי"

Offline chamdena

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Ok. Here is one that some might get and some not:
Someone once called up Mrs. Sternberg (senior) and asked her for the Rebbes bedikah cloth...
Lololol!!!