Author Topic: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread  (Read 63598 times)

Online Something Fishy

  • Global Moderator
  • Dansdeals Lifetime Presidential Platinum Elite
  • **********
  • Join Date: Jan 2011
  • Posts: 7523
  • Total likes: 2913
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 44
    • View Profile
    • Kosher Horizons
  • Location: Not Brooklyn
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #60 on: May 26, 2020, 05:50:24 PM »
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.
Check out my site for epic kosher adventures: Kosher Horizons

Online Lurker

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 4477
  • Total likes: 4865
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #61 on: May 26, 2020, 05:56:27 PM »
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.

I think peaks are the highest. Plateaus are where flattery comes up kinda flat.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Online etech0

  • Dansdeals Lifetime 10K Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Dec 2013
  • Posts: 12116
  • Total likes: 2166
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: not lakewood
  • Programs: DDF
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #62 on: May 26, 2020, 06:07:14 PM »
I think peaks are the highest. Plateaus are where flattery comes up kinda flat.
peaks are higher but they aren't flat
Workflowy. You won't know what you're missing until you try it.

Online Lurker

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 4477
  • Total likes: 4865
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #63 on: May 26, 2020, 06:09:30 PM »
peaks are higher but they aren't flat

Great, I feel stupid. Not the first time today. Good stuff.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline username

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2008
  • Posts: 4305
  • Total likes: 429
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 12
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: C Heights
  • Programs: ┌──────────────────┐ │───> Ữ₴ΣЯИΛΜӘ <─── │ └──────────────────┘
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #64 on: May 26, 2020, 06:20:18 PM »
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.
Allegjdes are higher.
^^^

Online etech0

  • Dansdeals Lifetime 10K Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Dec 2013
  • Posts: 12116
  • Total likes: 2166
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: not lakewood
  • Programs: DDF
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #65 on: May 26, 2020, 06:24:29 PM »
Great, I feel stupid. Not the first time today. Good stuff.
Sorry!
Workflowy. You won't know what you're missing until you try it.

Online YitzyS

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2015
  • Posts: 3431
  • Total likes: 6589
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 21
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Lakewood, NJ
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #66 on: July 09, 2020, 02:13:47 PM »
Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Offline username

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2008
  • Posts: 4305
  • Total likes: 429
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 12
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: C Heights
  • Programs: ┌──────────────────┐ │───> Ữ₴ΣЯИΛΜӘ <─── │ └──────────────────┘
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #67 on: July 09, 2020, 04:00:16 PM »
UUYYY!

Offline joe1234

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Jul 2015
  • Posts: 1561
  • Total likes: 204
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 18
    • View Profile
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #68 on: July 09, 2020, 09:58:42 PM »
I thought you wood screw up but wow did you drill it.

Offline justaregularguy

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Sep 2014
  • Posts: 1031
  • Total likes: 440
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
  • Location: not brooklyn
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #69 on: July 09, 2020, 11:17:09 PM »
saw a tweet that said :

man: i may have hurt myself doing hagba'ah just now

Rabbi: i think you may have Torah ligament
nothings impossible- the word itself says Im possible

Online Lurker

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jul 2019
  • Posts: 4477
  • Total likes: 4865
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: As always, silence is NOT an admission of agreement on DDF. It just means that people lack the stamina to keep on arguing with made up "facts", illogical arguments, deceiving statements, nasty and degrading comments, and fuzzy math. - @yelped
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #70 on: July 09, 2020, 11:22:22 PM »
saw a tweet that said :

man: i may have hurt myself doing hagba'ah just now

Rabbi: i think you may have Torah ligament


She has great horrible puns.
Failing at maintaining Lurker status.

Offline justaregularguy

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Sep 2014
  • Posts: 1031
  • Total likes: 440
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
  • Location: not brooklyn
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #71 on: July 09, 2020, 11:32:59 PM »

She has great horrible puns.
thats the one. ( looks like you follow the tweets thread too 👍)
nothings impossible- the word itself says Im possible

Online YitzyS

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2015
  • Posts: 3431
  • Total likes: 6589
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 21
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Lakewood, NJ
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #72 on: July 14, 2020, 05:42:34 PM »
 ::)
Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Online YitzyS

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2015
  • Posts: 3431
  • Total likes: 6589
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 21
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Lakewood, NJ
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #73 on: July 21, 2020, 03:46:36 PM »


Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Offline yeshivabucher

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Mar 2018
  • Posts: 1145
  • Total likes: 226
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 5
    • View Profile
  • Location: Monsey
  • Programs: Travel Agent, Marriott Gold, Hertz PC, National EE, Uber VIP, SPG Gold
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #74 on: July 29, 2020, 11:39:10 AM »

Online YitzyS

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2015
  • Posts: 3431
  • Total likes: 6589
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 21
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Lakewood, NJ
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #75 on: August 20, 2020, 10:51:59 PM »


Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Online YitzyS

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2015
  • Posts: 3431
  • Total likes: 6589
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 21
  • Gender: Male
    • View Profile
  • Location: Lakewood, NJ
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #76 on: August 20, 2020, 10:52:13 PM »


Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Online yungermanchik

  • Dansdeals Lifetime Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Nov 2018
  • Posts: 1246
  • Total likes: 850
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 0
    • View Profile
  • Location: Previous Signatures: If you chapped hana'ah from a post, like it; You think you know the answers and things are the way they seem.. it just ain't so -The Rebbe from Lublin-
Small people talk about other people.
Average people talk about things
BIG PEOPLE TALK ABOUT IDEAS.

Online etech0

  • Dansdeals Lifetime 10K Presidential Platinum Elite
  • *******
  • Join Date: Dec 2013
  • Posts: 12116
  • Total likes: 2166
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 1
    • View Profile
  • Location: not lakewood
  • Programs: DDF
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #78 on: August 21, 2020, 11:00:26 AM »
Math Instruction
Workflowy. You won't know what you're missing until you try it.

Offline Yehuda57

  • Dansdeals Presidential Platinum Elite
  • ********
  • Join Date: Jan 2014
  • Posts: 2760
  • Total likes: 6475
  • DansDeals.com Hat Tips 6
    • View Profile
  • Location: Brooklyn
Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #79 on: August 21, 2020, 02:24:38 PM »
Quote from: ExGingi
Yehuda57 needs to spew a certain amount of sarcasm in order to survive through the day.