Author Topic: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread  (Read 220974 times)

Offline S209

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #220 on: February 02, 2021, 08:42:04 PM »
I'll kick it off.

Q) What was the snowman doing on DDF?

A) Just chillin'
Quote from: YitzyS
Quotes in a signature is annoying, as it comes across as an independent post.

Offline Something Fishy

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #221 on: February 02, 2021, 08:54:56 PM »
Come on, it has a huge fanbase.

Well of course, but no one I knew (til now).
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Offline Euclid

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #222 on: February 02, 2021, 08:58:00 PM »
Well of course, but no one I knew (til now).
You made a huge mistake.

Online Yehuda57

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #223 on: February 02, 2021, 09:13:57 PM »
Well of course, but no one I knew (til now).

It's all I think about seeing the model homes in the Chassidish community in Tampa thread

Offline justaregularguy

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #224 on: February 02, 2021, 09:43:28 PM »
It has a cult following!

Victor Borge on the other hand, it's just us and the Friedmans
inflationary language
nothings impossible- the word itself says Im possible

Online Yehuda57

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #225 on: February 02, 2021, 09:47:05 PM »
inflationary language
Sorry, it's just us and the FriedmEn. Have a twoderful night!

Offline NTorch

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #226 on: February 05, 2021, 08:55:36 AM »



Offline TimT

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Offline Randomex

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #228 on: February 07, 2021, 01:52:16 PM »
Q: There are 3 men on a boat with 4 cigarettes and no source of fire. How do they manage to smoke?

A: They throw one cigarette overboard and the boat becomes a cigarette lighter.
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Offline TimT

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Offline TimT

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Offline Randomex

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Offline Something Fishy

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #232 on: February 08, 2021, 10:29:14 AM »
https://twitter.com/Dadsaysjokes/status/1358492879883231234

I literally snorted, which I suppose is the highest form of compliment in this thread. Like.
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Offline Yo ssi

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #233 on: February 08, 2021, 10:36:48 PM »
Good pun, IMO.
Feel free to like, some say that's important :P
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Offline YitzyS

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #234 on: February 08, 2021, 10:43:05 PM »
Feel free to like, some say that's important :P
You pinged me?

Offline Yo ssi

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #235 on: February 08, 2021, 11:12:52 PM »
You pinged me?
Time for you to get some tips from @Euclid :P
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Offline Randomex

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #236 on: February 09, 2021, 11:32:33 AM »
Feel free to like, some say that's important :P

This thread is for bad puns.
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Offline YitzyS

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #237 on: February 09, 2021, 11:43:14 AM »
This thread is for bad puns.
All puns are bad.

Offline Randomex

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #238 on: February 09, 2021, 11:57:00 AM »
There was a man in Bulgaria who drove a train for a living.

He loved his job, driving a train had been his dream ever since he was a child.

He loved to make the train go as fast as possible.

Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash.

He made it out, but a single person died.

Well, needless to say, he went to court over this incident.

He was found guilty, and was sentenced to death by electrocution.

When the day of the execution came, he requested a single banana as his last meal.

After eating the banana, he was strapped into the electric chair.

The switch was flown, sparks flew and smoke filled the air- but nothing happened.

The man was perfectly fine.

Well, at the time, there was an old Bulgarian law that said a failed execution
was a sign of divine intervention, so the man was allowed to go free.

And somehow, he managed to get his old job back driving the train.

Having not learned his lesson at all, he went right back to driving the train with reckless abandon.

Once again, he caused a train to crash, this time killing two people.

The trial went much the same as the first, resulting in a sentence of execution.

For his final meal, the man requested two bananas.

After eating the bananas, he was strapped into the electric chair.

The switch was thrown, sparks flew, smoke filled the room- and the man was once again unharmed.

Well, this of course meant that he was free to go.

And once again, he somehow manages to get his old job back.

To what should have been the surprise of no one, he crashed yet another train and killed three people.

And so he once again found himself being sentenced to death.

On the day of his execution, he requested his final meal- three bananas.

"You know what? No," said the executioner. "I've had it with you and your stupid bananas and walking
out of here unharmed. I'm not giving you a thing to eat, we're strapping you in and doing this now."

Well, it was against protocol, but the man was strapped in to the electric chair without a last meal.

The switch was pulled, sparks flew, smoke filled the room- and the man was still unharmed.

The executioner was speechless.

The man looked at the executioner and said "Oh, the bananas had nothing to do with it. I'm just a bad conductor."
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Offline YitzyS

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #239 on: February 09, 2021, 12:00:24 PM »