Author Topic: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread  (Read 221153 times)

Online YitzyS

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #560 on: June 06, 2021, 08:33:44 AM »
Lol

Is that your twitter handle?
SC after 1s of being posted...
Could've been SC by the poster and than sent around on WhatsApp...

Online AsherO

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #561 on: June 06, 2021, 08:35:05 AM »
Could've been SC by the poster and than sent around on WhatsApp...

The Frum equivalent of omnichannel posting :D
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Offline TzviR

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #562 on: June 06, 2021, 12:04:16 PM »
Lol

Is that your twitter handle?
SC after 1s of being posted...

This:
Could've been SC by the poster and than sent around on WhatsApp...
I don’t even have Twitter, saw it on Rebbejokes WhatsApp status

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Offline NTorch

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #563 on: June 07, 2021, 09:27:20 AM »



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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #564 on: June 07, 2021, 08:38:17 PM »
What did the mathematician do when he got an ingrown toenail?

Sohcahtoa

Offline NTorch

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #565 on: June 08, 2021, 09:32:05 AM »



Offline NTorch

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #566 on: June 09, 2021, 09:29:23 AM »



Online Euclid

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #567 on: June 09, 2021, 09:48:15 AM »

Offline yungermanchik

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #568 on: June 09, 2021, 03:01:45 PM »


Small people talk about other people.
Average people talk about things
BIG PEOPLE TALK ABOUT IDEAS.

Offline joe1234

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #569 on: June 09, 2021, 10:29:50 PM »

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #570 on: June 09, 2021, 10:55:04 PM »
Reminds me of the joke:

Ruven overhears the person next to him saying Hallal and he didn't pause after the word vayanos, instead he pauses after the word hayarden:

הים ראה וינס הירדן

So Ruven points out the mistake, but the person is adamant that he's right. So Ruven notes that it doesn't make sense, because why would the Yarden run if it was the Yam who saw?

To which the guy responded, "That's precisely the question in the next line! מה לך הים כי תנוס הירדן

Offline yos9694

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #571 on: June 09, 2021, 11:09:37 PM »
Reminds me of the joke:

Ruven overhears the person next to him saying Hallal and he didn't pause after the word vayanos, instead he pauses after the word hayarden:

הים ראה וינס הירדן

So Ruven points out the mistake, but the person is adamant that he's right. So Ruven notes that it doesn't make sense, because why would the Yarden run if it was the Yam who saw?

To which the guy responded, "That's precisely the question in the next line! מה לך הים כי תנוס הירדן

Now we can have the proper kavanah tomorrow

Offline joe1234

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #572 on: June 09, 2021, 11:21:55 PM »
Reminds me of the joke:

Ruven overhears the person next to him saying Hallal and he didn't pause after the word vayanos, instead he pauses after the word hayarden:

הים ראה וינס הירדן

So Ruven points out the mistake, but the person is adamant that he's right. So Ruven notes that it doesn't make sense, because why would the Yarden run if it was the Yam who saw?

To which the guy responded, "That's precisely the question in the next line! מה לך הים כי תנוס הירדן
I actually only added that word to reference the joke about splitting the sea…

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #573 on: June 10, 2021, 06:47:24 AM »
Reminds me of the joke:

Ruven overhears the person next to him saying Hallal and he didn't pause after the word vayanos, instead he pauses after the word hayarden:

הים ראה וינס הירדן

So Ruven points out the mistake, but the person is adamant that he's right. So Ruven notes that it doesn't make sense, because why would the Yarden run if it was the Yam who saw?

To which the guy responded, "That's precisely the question in the next line! מה לך הים כי תנוס הירדן

Reminds me of the joke with the ignoramus Kohen who was told he’s supposed to understand ברכת כהנים, which he insisted he does.

So when they asked him what ויחנךּ means he said it means “and he should choke you”. The questioner gasped and asked “so that’s what you think by ויחנךּ when you’re benching me?!” To which the ignoramus Kohen replies “no, by ויחנךּ I think about the עכו״ם...”
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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #574 on: June 10, 2021, 08:47:11 AM »
Reminds me of the joke:

Ruven overhears the person next to him saying Hallal and he didn't pause after the word vayanos, instead he pauses after the word hayarden:

הים ראה וינס הירדן

So Ruven points out the mistake, but the person is adamant that he's right. So Ruven notes that it doesn't make sense, because why would the Yarden run if it was the Yam who saw?

To which the guy responded, "That's precisely the question in the next line! מה לך הים כי תנוס הירדן
Reminds me of the joke with the ignoramus Kohen who was told he’s supposed to understand ברכת כהנים, which he insisted he does.

So when they asked him what ויחנךּ means he said it means “and he should choke you”. The questioner gasped and asked “so that’s what you think by ויחנךּ when you’re benching me?!” To which the ignoramus Kohen replies “no, by ויחנךּ I think about the עכו״ם...”
Wrong thread. These are neither corny nor bad! :D

Offline NTorch

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #575 on: June 10, 2021, 09:09:12 AM »



Online AsherO

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #576 on: June 10, 2021, 09:19:44 AM »
Wrong thread. These are neither corny nor bad! :D

“Reminds me of” is code for off-topic tangent
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Online Euclid

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #577 on: June 10, 2021, 12:58:08 PM »



Offline JlmBoi

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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #578 on: June 10, 2021, 04:22:14 PM »
A chusid once bragged to me that his Rebbe is greater than the Maharal. The Maharal created one goilem. His Rebbe created thousands.
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Re: Corny Jokes & Bad Puns Thread
« Reply #579 on: June 11, 2021, 12:56:54 AM »
A chusid once bragged to me that his Rebbe is greater than the Maharal. The Maharal created one goilem. His Rebbe created thousands.
Lol. But this goilem is conflating creating a goilem with attracting goilems. The latter is super easy, hence their big success.