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Author Topic: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread  (Read 199420 times)

Online AsherO

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1520 on: May 04, 2021, 10:51:59 PM »
I have a cousin. She's over 6' tall. She was redt to me 17 times. By 17 different people.

My mother: "she's my niece, I know she's not for my son"
17 geniuses: "but what do you mean, they're both tall!"

At your height it doesn’t even matter, nearly every girl/person (including said cousin) is a head shorter than you anyway.

I had that too - I'm over 6 feet tall, and got redt a girl who was taller than me - likely in large part because of our height.

Punny choice of words.

Offline sguitarist18

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1521 on: May 04, 2021, 11:23:18 PM »
The thought crossed my mind as I was writing it.

Offline Randomex

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1522 on: May 05, 2021, 04:54:08 PM »
One of my brothers was redt to a tall girl based on his height. They've been married for a couple of years now.
If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Offline Moshe123

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1523 on: May 05, 2021, 05:07:37 PM »
Most shidduchim that are redt are anyway based on very superficial things.

Offline sguitarist18

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1524 on: May 05, 2021, 05:11:08 PM »
I'm not sure if it's 100% true, but our shadchan said by my sheva brachos that he and his wife set us up because we're both tall and slim.

Truth be told it's as good a bet as any - most shadchanim aren't really able to have such a clear picture of both sides that they're going to have a great track record of setting people up who are deeply appropriate for each other.

Online TimT

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1525 on: May 05, 2021, 05:44:13 PM »

Offline Randomex

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1526 on: May 05, 2021, 06:55:26 PM »
If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Online Yehuda57

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1527 on: May 05, 2021, 07:55:38 PM »
Quote from: ExGingi
Yehuda57 needs to spew a certain amount of sarcasm in order to survive through the day.

Offline Randomex

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1528 on: May 05, 2021, 11:57:19 PM »
If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Offline Randomex

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If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Online Yehuda57

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1530 on: May 06, 2021, 11:12:53 AM »

This *rolls dice* election bill is *rolls dice* minority disenfranchisement based on *rolls dice* systemic racism is *rolls dice* white supremacy
Quote from: ExGingi
Yehuda57 needs to spew a certain amount of sarcasm in order to survive through the day.

Offline yesitsme

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1531 on: May 09, 2021, 06:07:44 AM »

We won't settle for anything less then cholent.

Offline Randomex

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1532 on: May 09, 2021, 07:34:21 PM »


If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Online Yehuda57

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1533 on: May 09, 2021, 08:18:53 PM »
Quote from: ExGingi
Yehuda57 needs to spew a certain amount of sarcasm in order to survive through the day.

Offline Definitions

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1534 on: May 09, 2021, 10:57:08 PM »
ROTFL that clip almost looks like it came out of a comedy movie  ;D

(I wouldn't have done any better but it's still funny)

Online Euclid

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The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1535 on: May 09, 2021, 11:55:24 PM »
This being Elchonon Schwartz - I'm 99.7% sure that he was putting on a clueless American persona, and that he speaks ivirit fluently IRL. The man is one of the most talented impressionists I've ever heard - there's no way he can't speak ivrit fluently, and with a perfect accent.

Online YitzyS

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1536 on: May 10, 2021, 12:09:01 AM »
This being Elchonon Schwartz - I'm 99.7% sure that he was putting on a clueless American persona, and that he speaks ivirit fluently IRL. The man is one of the most talented impressionists I've ever heard - there's no way he can't speak ivrit fluently, and with a perfect accent.
You can hear Elchonon Schwartz doing a broken Hebrew impression on this album, the fourth track (The Power of Maariv), at the 12:50 mark. (Great album BTW)
Monkeys don't fly unless you put them on airplanes

Offline Randomex

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1537 on: May 10, 2021, 07:00:41 AM »
If I find a dead deer, I don't have to fight a bear for it. I don't even have to eat it if I don't want to.

Offline PlatinumGuy

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1538 on: May 10, 2021, 04:11:10 PM »
״וזה כלל גדול: שישנא אדם כל דבר שקר. וכל מה שיוסיף שנאה לדרכי השקר – יוסיף אהבה לתורה.״ - אורחות צדיקים

Offline Mordyk

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Re: The Funny/strange/interesting/random Tweets Thread
« Reply #1539 on: May 10, 2021, 05:54:11 PM »
In other Israel news.... ;D
#TYH