Author Topic: Stuff Your Kid Tells You (Read 147823 times)

dealfinder85 · « **Reply #120 on:** March 13, 2015, 01:22:28 PM »

Quote from: Ergel on March 13, 2015, 01:21:58 PM

She's 5. And she's very religious

got confused with TimTs kid

smee123 · « **Reply #121 on:** March 13, 2015, 03:08:28 PM »

2 yr old opens the fridge
"i want Aleph bais gimmel daled hey vav"
Olives

dealfinder85 · « **Reply #122 on:** March 13, 2015, 03:15:55 PM »

3 year old nephew the other day
shema yisrael Hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
vea'havta es hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
(rinse repeat)

Dr Moose · « **Reply #123 on:** March 13, 2015, 03:21:51 PM »

Quote from: dealfinder85 on March 13, 2015, 03:15:55 PM

3 year old nephew the other day
shema yisrael Hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
vea'havta es hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
(rinse repeat)

hey, we've all been there ובשעריך ... והיה

Achas Veachas · « **Reply #124 on:** March 13, 2015, 03:23:01 PM »

Quote from: dealfinder85 on March 13, 2015, 03:15:55 PM

3 year old nephew the other day
shema yisrael Hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
vea'havta es hashem echad
baruch shem kevod malchuso le'olam va'ed
(rinse repeat)

Give it a few years and he'll be doing the Shema>Vehaya>Uvishearech>Vehaya........ circuit

ETA: The good Dr. beat me to it

dealfinder85 · « **Reply #125 on:** March 13, 2015, 03:23:11 PM »

Quote from: Dr Moose on March 13, 2015, 03:21:51 PM

hey, we've all been there ובשעריך ... והיה

especially those very tired friday nights when your shema is taking 3 times as long as everyone else and you could have sworn you said vehaya 3 times

shauly · « **Reply #126 on:** March 14, 2015, 04:03:17 PM »

My sister a few years ago: Papa, you really don't know a lot of things, do you?

Sport · « **Reply #127 on:** March 14, 2015, 08:51:18 PM »

Quote from: Ergel on March 13, 2015, 01:21:58 PM

She's 5. And she's very religious

Speaking of religious daughters. Last night, After pouring My 3 yr old half a cup of Grape juice she says Daddy You need to give me more bc I need to say a kidush.

eis517 · « **Reply #128 on:** March 14, 2015, 09:03:48 PM »

Quote from: Ergel on March 13, 2015, 01:21:58 PM

She's 5. And she's very religious

Toronto does that to you. Also, why is she calling you at 1:15 in the afternoon? No school?

Tankchucker · « **Reply #129 on:** March 14, 2015, 09:05:36 PM »

Quote from: eis517 on March 14, 2015, 09:03:48 PM

why is she calling you at 1:15 in the afternoon? No school?

School at 1:15 on a Friday?

Tankchucker · « **Reply #130 on:** March 17, 2015, 08:58:36 PM »

4 y/o brother describing his school trip to the matzah bakery

"they take sugar and water and mix it in a big bowl..."

Ergel · « **Reply #131 on:** March 17, 2015, 09:57:05 PM »

Two new ones:

My five year old starts bawling in the middle of shema and won't tell us what's wrong. Finally she gets it together and says my yetzer hara is telling be to do something bad and I don't want to listen to it. Had to coax it out of her but the yetzer hara was telling her to hit her sister.

Our three year old like to suck her thumb while holding her blanket. Showed her pictures of herself in utero. She is sucking her thumb. She says look I'm sucking my thumb in Ema's belly with my blanky

Sport · « **Reply #132 on:** March 20, 2015, 08:35:18 AM »

My 3 year old this morning notices our gold fish and trank are gone.
So she asks me " hey dady what happened to the fish"
Me, trying to avoid telling her the harsh reality of goldfish: " it went away"
My daughter: "oh, it died ? "
Me: "😕 "

12HRS · « **Reply #133 on:** March 20, 2015, 09:50:43 AM »

Quote from: Sport on March 20, 2015, 08:35:18 AM

My 3 year old this morning notices our gold fish and trank are gone.
So she asks me " hey dady what happened to the fish"
Me, trying to avoid telling her the harsh reality of goldfish: " it went away"
My daughter: "oh, it died ? "
Me: "😕 "

meanwhile your kid at school is starting a round of "stuff your parents tell you"

dealfinder85 · « **Reply #134 on:** March 20, 2015, 09:52:15 AM »

Quote from: 12HRS on March 20, 2015, 09:50:43 AM

meanwhile your kid at school is starting a round of "stuff your parents tell you"

"if i make a funny face, it could freeze that way"

Achas Veachas · « **Reply #135 on:** March 20, 2015, 10:14:43 AM »

Quote from: 12HRS on March 20, 2015, 09:50:43 AM

meanwhile your kid at school is starting a round of "stuff your parents tell you"

"If you drink coffee you you'll stop growing"

If you drink the Havdalah wine you will grow a beard"

Dr Moose · « **Reply #136 on:** March 20, 2015, 10:26:12 AM »

maybe start a new thread: what you tell your kids.

Tankchucker · « **Reply #137 on:** March 20, 2015, 10:32:52 AM »

Quote from: Dr Moose on March 20, 2015, 10:26:12 AM

maybe start a new thread: what you tell your kids.

And another thread of stuff your kids overhear.

benjie1305 · « **Reply #138 on:** March 20, 2015, 10:35:02 AM »

Quote from: Tankchucker on March 20, 2015, 10:32:52 AM

And another thread of stuff your kids overhear.

That one's a scary one..

Yehuda57 · « **Reply #139 on:** March 20, 2015, 11:03:06 AM »

My 3 year old daughter seems to have really taken the "aizehu oshir" mishna to heart:

After she colored on the table cloth. My wife sternly told her to clean it up. The methods she used weren't working, so they discussed putting into the washing machine when she says, "Mommy, you have to be happy with whatever you have. So even if I colored on the table cloth, you have to be happy."

The day before, while walking on the street, she found a rock she liked and picked it up. A minute later she looks on jealously at a girl on a scooter and says, "That girl has a scooter," but then puts on a huge smile and adds, "But I have a rock!"