Shlomo Yehuda Rechnitz Article

[yakov116]

No one suggested to wipe the torah, we're talking about not learning the entire day,
If you look back in history there was never a kollel system or any of the kind, then norm was to get married at 18-20 and then they would get a job (if they haven't had one by then...) and they had a sheer in the morning and at night,
אחד מאלף who really meant it didn't go to work and would just sit in shul/Yeshiva and continue his learnings, very few were in this category..

My point wasn't that chassidim believe in abolishing torah. My point that the differentiator between chaissidim and yeshivahs community is the value placed on torah learning.

Can I know the "value" of Torah by Chassidim?

[PlatinumGuy]

Can I know the "value" of Torah by Chassidim?

Not as central to Jewish life as it is to talmidim of vilan gaon and his talmidim, like myself.

I'm surprised that you'd dispute that.

[Toasted]

All things being equal, I don't think there would be a Rav in the world who would advise marrying a less attractive girl.

Seems unlikely according to the screwed ideology they taught in your yeshiva. Any serious ben toireh would be embarrassed to even ask the question.

Nothing wrong with good looks, but it's a total contradiction to the 'shevet levi' ideology that we're sacrificing our society for.

[Baruch]

He's saying if a woman possesses these characteristics and uses them lshem shamayim then they become praiseworthy. Doesn't contradict the notion that a guy who wants a younger girl because she's prettier is nothing close to a ben toirah.

Do you understand how chen and yofi are used leshem shamayim? By keeping her husband's eyes and mind pure.

[Drago]

Rational as always

And in the playing field no doubt. 

[Baruch]

Seems unlikely according to the screwed ideology they taught in your yeshiva. Any serious ben toireh would be embarrassed to even ask the question.

Nothing wrong with good looks, but it's a total contradiction to the 'shevet levi' ideology that we're sacrificing our society for.

Why shouldn't a shevet levi be allowed to marry a better looking girl (all things being equal). Rava married a woman in every city he traveled to fight the yetzer hara.

[PlatinumGuy]

Nothing wrong with good looks, but it's a total contradiction to the 'shevet levi' ideology that we're sacrificing our society for.

Why?

[Toasted]

Do you understand how chen and yofi are used leshem shamayim? By keeping her husband's eyes and mind pure.

That's her responsibility and virtue. Doesn't imply that 'bnei toirah' should be looking for models.

[yakov116]

Not as central to Jewish life as it is to talmidim of vilan gaon and his talmidim, like myself.

I'm surprised that you'd dispute that.

The Torah is the central of every Jews life. Does a person that's working  make the Torah secondary?
Where do you get that Chassidim put Torah in the back seat?

[Baruch]

That's her responsibility and virtue. Doesn't imply that 'bnei toirah' should be looking for models.

I didn't say they should be looking for models.
I do believe that if there are 2 shidduchim on the table, and it's equal, besides one is a model, he should absolutely go for the model.

And if he'd ask his Rosh Yeshiva, he'd tell him the same.

[Toasted]

I didn't say they should be looking for models.

Thank you.
So stop defending a 'system' where that is anywhere from acceptable to even encouraged.

[Achas Veachas]

I didn't say they should be looking for models.
I do believe that if there are 2 shidduchim on the table, and it's equal, besides one is a model, he should absolutely go for the model.

And if he'd ask his Rosh Yeshiva, he'd tell him the same.

The keywords here are "if he'd ask".
Where I grew up we had an expression אזוי ווי מ'פרעגט אזא ענטפער קריגט מען...

[yakov116]

Can someone explain me the hetter for shidduch shopping? [when a shidduch comes up and he/she says "good but maybe there someone better”]

[Toasted]

Why?

I didn't say they should be looking for models.

Ask Baruch.

[Toasted]

The keywords here are "if he'd ask".
Where I grew up we had an expression אזוי ווי מ'פרעגט אזא ענטפער קריגט מען...

+1+1=3

[Drago]

Rava married a woman in every city he traveled to fight the yetzer hara.

Going to open a thread regarding the permissibility of concubines according to halacha? 

[zale]

Call me crazy, but I don't believe there is any "crisis".

People today are more informed and more in touch with the realities of life. Whereas in the last generation you "blindly" got married because your mommy said "she is beautiful and amazing", or "he is smart and responsible", today people actually assess their potential lifetime partner.

A girl does not want to end up with a guy who can't provide for his family and doesn't respect and care for her or the kids, and a guy does not want to end up with a girl that suffers from serious emotional issues because she was abused as a child.

Would you believe that people actually want a lifetime spouse that they can love? Would you believe that people actually want to be happy?

Naturally, it takes longer to find the right match when you actually want to be sure that you like the person you will be spending the rest of your life with.

[aygart]

When it was common for women not to survive childbirth there was less of an issue. Many men went through a few wives over their lifetime.

[Mordyk]

Call me crazy, but I don't believe there is any "crisis".

People today are more informed and more in touch with the realities of life. Whereas in the last generation you "blindly" got married because your mommy said "she is beautiful and amazing", or "he is smart and responsible", today people actually assess their potential lifetime partner.

A girl does not want to end up with a guy who can't provide for his family and doesn't respect and care for her or the kids, and a guy does not want to end up with a girl that suffers from serious emotional issues because she was abused as a child.

Would you believe that people actually want a lifetime spouse that they can love? Would you believe that people actually want to be happy?

Naturally, it takes longer to find the right match when you actually want to be sure that you like the person you will be spending the rest of your life with.

if you justify the reason boys wait till age 24 because they want to make sure of their decision, then why do they expect a girl should want to marry them at age 19?

[zale]

if you justify the reason boys wait till age 24 because they want to make sure of their decision, then why do they expect a girl should want to marry them at age 19?

My point exactly. In my opinion most girls (and definitely guys) at 19 today are not ready for marriage. I can't speak for past generations, but I don't believe that 19 is emotionally mature enough to start a family in this generation. (not that it can't be done. It could be done, but there will likely be resentment).