Delusional, especially 20 years down the road.
My family made a wedding recently for under $20k altogether for our side (boy's side), including shadchanus, basic jewelery and gifts for kallah, clothing for chosson, half of Lakewood takanah package wedding (slightly upgraded buffet and photography), basic aufruf, and assistance with basic furnishings for starter apartment. It was a very respectable affair. It's possible. Everyone has a different definition of normal. Most people from certain communities probably spend more on jewelry than we spent altogether, and they wouldn't consider than abnormal either. However, delusional is a strong word. It depends on your demographic and what you, your children, and your mechutanim choose to prioritize and invest in, and what your standards are.
Regardless, this is wrong thread, and this discussion is just pointless rabbit hole. It's been discussed pretty exhaustively on some other threads.