Author Topic: joke for sheva brachot  (Read 95526 times)

Offline zh cohen

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #120 on: January 16, 2022, 03:59:22 PM »
ust saw this joke retweeted.

What is the joke here?

Offline AsherO

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #121 on: January 16, 2022, 08:01:17 PM »
Isn't this a thread for men?

What about Sheva Brachos? Are those just for men too?

🙄
DDF FFB (Forum From Birth)

Offline qooldude

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #122 on: February 23, 2022, 12:10:18 AM »
As a side note, just think a moment: do you think it's nice and appropriate to make all these jokes about mother-in-laws?
They're not human? They have no feelings? They don't get offended?

I actually respect my mother-in-law very much.

Just think about it.
So as the joke goes, the mother of the kallah comes over to the badchan after the mitzvah tantz and starts telling him how insulted she is and how it's not nice to make fun of her. So the badchan tells her No! I wasn't talking about you, I was talking about your Shvigger...
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Online Live N Learn

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #123 on: February 23, 2022, 02:24:51 AM »
The moral is to buy your wife Airpods.
So that she can burn those too?!
".איזהו חכם, הלומד מכל אדם"

Offline Dan

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #124 on: June 17, 2022, 05:15:39 PM »
They did tell them it was their honeymoon, but when they saw it was to DTW the gate agent figured she was doing the bride a favor....
Save your time, I don't answer PM. Post it in the forum and a dedicated DDF'er will get back to you as soon as possible.

Offline Jm1248

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #125 on: April 27, 2023, 07:10:25 PM »
Any fresh jokes here? I'll contribute one too :)

A friend of mine was newly married and he told me things weren't working out so well, so it was suggested he go with his wife for marriage counseling. When they arrived at the therapist’s office, the therapist jumped right in and opened the floor to discussion. “What seems to be the problem here?” So my friend told me that he just sat there quietly – he didn’t really have much to say. His wife, on the other hand, started talking 90 miles an hour describing all the terrible things wrong with their marriage. After 5 - - 10 - - 15 minutes of listening, the therapist goes over to this guys wife, gives her a big hug, and sits back down. Afterwards, his wife just sits there, speechless. Then the therapist turns to the husband and he says “your wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!” So he thinks for a second and says “okay, I guess I can bring her back here on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

Offline YitzyS

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #126 on: April 27, 2023, 07:59:32 PM »
Any fresh jokes here? I'll contribute one too :)

A friend of mine was newly married and he told me things weren't working out so well, so it was suggested he go with his wife for marriage counseling. When they arrived at the therapist’s office, the therapist jumped right in and opened the floor to discussion. “What seems to be the problem here?” So my friend told me that he just sat there quietly – he didn’t really have much to say. His wife, on the other hand, started talking 90 miles an hour describing all the terrible things wrong with their marriage. After 5 - - 10 - - 15 minutes of listening, the therapist goes over to this guys wife, gives her a big hug, and sits back down. Afterwards, his wife just sits there, speechless. Then the therapist turns to the husband and he says “your wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!” So he thinks for a second and says “okay, I guess I can bring her back here on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”
I thought this was going in a different direction:

After the wife went on rambling for 20 minutes straight without stopping, the therapist hands them back the money and offers the husband the address of  a liquor store and a divorce Bais Din...

Offline elazarb

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #127 on: April 27, 2023, 11:00:48 PM »
Trying to remember a joke about a Rabbi who only has one speech on pars has korach and pulls it off to say it every week. Anyone know it?
Whenevr Rabbi is asked to speak in a different shul he gets up and says "You know I was just passing by and decided to drop in. Speaking of dropping in, it says in Parshas Korach..."
(ya it took me 6 years and now I just remembered)

Offline joe1234

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #128 on: April 08, 2024, 08:45:30 PM »
I'm speaking soon, anyone have any jokes?

Offline aygart

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #129 on: April 08, 2024, 08:46:11 PM »
I'm speaking soon, anyone have any jokes?

Use eclipse and earthquake jokes
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline DaasTora

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #130 on: April 08, 2024, 11:07:36 PM »
Use eclipse and earthquake jokes
ISO certified Solar Eclipse glasses for sale 5 for $5. slightly used. lakewood area

Offline YitzyS

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #131 on: April 08, 2024, 11:41:29 PM »
Use eclipse and earthquake jokes
Our office is going digital, but it's getting out of hand. I was looking for paper clips but was told that as of today they only offer eclipse

Offline Ver hut gazugt

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Re: joke for sheva brachot
« Reply #132 on: April 09, 2024, 02:03:26 AM »