I'm not, BH. Just try my best to make all minyanim possible.
So why not take the UA afternoon flight? That is what I choose (though as of this summer I believe DL also has an afternoon flight a few times a week).
As for sleeping, I hear Ambien is the best (though I haven't used it). DL business class is also very conducive to sleeping (at least on the TLV-JFK segment - night flight with excellent bedding).
Regarding chiyuv, as long as one is not a חרש, שוטה או קטן why wouldn't he be mechuyav to daven with a minyan?
Lastly regarding negel vasser, my solution is to get one of those rather large clear plastic cups they have on flights (I think it's 10 or 12 Oz) and a couple of water bottles. I fill up the cup when ready to wash, and wash into the sick bag.