The School Crisis

[ShlockDoc]

+100

we walked out in tears after being told that basically we weren't good parents and we've set up our 4 year old for failure

Wow.  Did you move to a different community?

[stbaum]

Wow.  Did you move to a different community?

No. My husband spent a good few years building his business. Starting from scratch was not an option. We Bh found a school that loves us and our daughter. Mind you it was hell to get accepted

[efflpetzel]

My daughter got accepted into a school end of August. Let me tell you I have A LOT to say on the subject. She is a 4 year old kid with nothing missing in her brain, her home, or her life in general Bh. Our problem? We simply don't 'belong' I grew up one way (that I despised and the feeling was mutual), dh went to a certain school, a different yeshiva, and another different mesivta. Therefore we don't belong to one certain type. Everyone only wants to accept their own kind. Unless you have buckets of money or an inside man. The situation is brutal. You try a nuetral school and they feel no responsibility to accept you. Mrs B from BYBP may she rot in hell set the standard for my 4 yr old so high that of course it was impossible. She really did a number on me. Sleepless nights. Gray hair on us (we're both in our 20's)... The schools make you go through hell and jump through their hoops before they say no. One letter in particular said (quote) 'we understand how difficult it must be to place your child. Unfortunately we are unable to assist at this time. We wish you much Hatzlocha.' Not even a meeting. Not an ounce of research on me and my family. No reason whatsoever. And then the so called rabbis cry that kids are going off the derech. Well those same hanhalas will have to answer some very tough questions when their time comes.

I went through & know of many many other people who went through your experience.

The school administrators & menahlim who do this are butchers who play with kids neshomos as if it were candy.


They will burn in hell forever & ever

[Moshe123]

One of my close relatives moved to Lakewood at the end of the summer. The mossad implied that they'll be accepted (I'm sure they will be at the end of the day). The kids are still home now without a cheder. So much rishus out there. No standards issue.

[ShlockDoc]

This is amazing to read. Why don't people leave?

[David Smith]

This is amazing to read. Why don't people leave?

Is the alternative really better?

(Yes, I know your answer.)

[mmgfarb]

This is amazing to read. Why don't people leave?

And go where exactly?

[mmgfarb]

Is the alternative really better?

(Yes, I know your answer.)

You can always move to Cleveland

[ShlockDoc]

And go where exactly?

There are dozens of Orthodox communities around the country that treat its members with respect and warmth. 

[ShlockDoc]

Is the alternative really better?

(Yes, I know your answer.)

I don't mean leave Orthodoxy.  I mean leave the neighborhood.  There are great Orthodox communities out there in the country.  Why do people put up with being spat on by their community?

[mmgfarb]

There are dozens of Orthodox communities around the country that treat its members with respect and warmth.

You're absolutely right, I grew up in Cleveland myself. My point is that it's not a viable option for so many people to just pick up and leave, for various different reasons.

[sky121]

There are dozens of Orthodox communities around the country that treat its members with respect and warmth.

Everywhere has these issue to whatever extent. It just seems the larger cities have them MUCH worse.

[elit]

Everywhere has these issue to whatever extent. It just seems the larger cities have them MUCH worse.

Is that true? ?

[ShlockDoc]

Everywhere has these issue to whatever extent. It just seems the larger cities have them MUCH worse.

No place is perfect but not everywhere is rejecting students and treating their families like garbage.  Just the opposite.

[grodnoking]

I believe it was Rich Roberts (not 100% positive) who tells the story of the school that didn't accept his kids because he was a BT. And he laughs because the school his children went to doesnt worry to much about raising money, while the one he tried to get them into but they where to good for his children need to beg around (he gives to them, but not the same).

[chaimmayer]

Wrote an article about it.
It turns out he had a vhs with uncle moishy tapes

[ShlockDoc]

the school that didn't accept his kids because he was a BT.

Is this real? Kids get rejected from schools because their parents are BTs?  Please tell me that's not real.

[elit]

Is this real? Kids get rejected from schools because their parents are BTs?  Please tell me that's not real.

Unfortunately it's very real

[chaimmayer]

[quote On a personal note, my first child was rejected from the Lakewood elementary school, that we applied to, three weeks before the school year was scheduled to start. For two weeks, I called multiple times to the school begging them to tell me why she was rejected. No one ever picked up the phone but I left messages explaining that I was not trying to get her into the school anymore but we just wanted to know if there was something that we needed to change or if I had insulted someone to whom I needed to apologize. For those two weeks, I felt that the Lakewood community had “spit me out” as Eretz Yisroel does to treif behavior. Since my daughter was six years old, and my wife was from Bais Yaakov of Boro Park, I could only conclude that I must have damaged my child by my being a baal tsheuvah. We would need to move ASAP out of Lakewood so that my daughter could go to school. The pain, the hurt, the aching was indescribably deep and unrelenting. After two weeks of no reply from the school, we were told from friends who knew the administration that we were rejected because we had a video machine (VHS in those days) in our home which we used to play children’s videos (Uncle Moishe, Sesame Street, etc.). That day we gave our video machine to a kiruv organization. Our home became video-free. With one week left to the school year, we were accepted to another “right wing” girl’s school in Lakewood which subsequently educated all of my girls and to which I donated over $1.6MM years later when I had some financial success
[/quote]
http://www.thelakewoodscoop.com/news/2016/01/exclusive-refining-rechnitz-targeting-written-by-richard-h-roberts-m-d-ph-d.html

[WhatNot]

This is one thing i do not understand. Because my family has an average middle class income, no pull in any school and neutral. Does that seriously mean that they have no place in a regular normal school?