Meanwhile on Imamother forum in the "Interesting story that happened to you" thread:"My fiance and I needed to get married legally before our actual wedding for technical reasons I'd rather not get into (A rov advised us to do this, before you jump on me with your halachic questions). We didn't realize it before we went to the courthouse, but we needed witnesses. My fiance, who like me is an obviously frum Jew, went over to another frum looking Jew in the parking lot and asked if he could be a witness. The guy started getting all uncomfortable and started stammering about stuff I couldn't understand, pretty random if you ask me. Then my fiance asked if he had ID and his eyes lit up and he said no. Who doesn't carry ID on them? It was clearly an excuse not to be a witness. It was all so weirdly random."
I got legally married before my chasuna.
Why?
Very standard in the Lakewood community.
Leads to less backing out under the Chuppah, it was a major problem, and this solved it.
I think in NJ it's required?
You can't marry religiously until you're married secularly?
I think people are confusing the license with the actual marriage. Most mesader kiddushin in Lakewood today want you to have a marriage license at the chupah.
to quote Dan's famous: Why?
Yes, this is what I was referring to. It's a legal requirement.
License to marry ≠ legally married
The mesader signs it at the wedding.
