About that "jewish" wedding

[whacked1]

probably best to start a new thread if it's a new topic

I started a separate conversation on this topic.

[imayid2]

I think you should clarify your original question as I’m honestly not clear what you meant to ask.

[Definitions]

Serious question though, as a parent, we all want our children be happy and have a successful lives. No one here should know of this test, but what would someone do if their child is gay and has zero interest the opposite gender?  There is no place for single people in the frum community. Do you try to force the child into a loveless marriage ?

There is nothing the parent should do. The person should be doing it themselves. I guess the only real option is some sort of therapy enough that it'll be possible to get married. I don't see any alternative other than being single.

As for the effectiveness of such therapy you would have to do research on it. I haven't done any.

[liosac]

https://asknoah.org/wp-content/uploads/rebbe-letter-to-man-struggling-with-homosexuality.pdf

https://hakirah.org/Vol%2012%20Goldberg.pdf

[Alexsei]

[Tweet]1670646354807275521[/tweet]

[VacationLover]

Serious question though, as a parent, we all want our children be happy and have a successful lives. No one here should know of this test, but what would someone do if their child is gay and has zero interest the opposite gender?  There is no place for single people in the frum community. Do you try to force the child into a loveless marriage ?

username (and profile picture) checks out

[AMH]

There is nothing the parent should do. The person should be doing it themselves. I guess the only real option is some sort of therapy enough that it'll be possible to get married. I don't see any alternative other than being single.

As for the effectiveness of such therapy you would have to do research on it. I haven't done any.

IIRC it can also come from a hormonal issue so that should sometimes be able to be treated with medication.

[Definitions]

IIRC it can also come from a hormonal issue so that should sometimes be able to be treated with medication.

I wouldn't trust medications like that

[Alexsei]

I wouldn't trust medications like that

Do you know a dealer in Lakewood ? 

[Definitions]

Do you know a dealer in Lakewood ? 

I don't understand what you're referencing

[imayid2]

https://hakirah.org/Vol%2012%20Goldberg.pdf

This created some controversy. I don’t have the link but in volume 13 Rabbi Rapoport responded in an article titled Judaism and Homosexuality: An Alternative Rabbinic View.
Also see here:
https://seforimblog.com/2013/01/hakirah-metzitzah-and-more

[Moish613]

what happens if you adopt a child and find out he's a mamzer?

Sender Zeyv has dealt with this question in his book The Rumspringa Kallah 

[Yehuda57]

username checks out

Uncalled for

[yr]

you are assuming the child cannot work on themselves to gain an attraction to the apposite gender.

I'm assuming you're referring to conversion therapy.

The general medical community has banned this. That's not to say it's never effective. But it is allegedly quite uncomfortable, anecdotally, based on reports from those that it did not work on (and it's probably no fun even for those it did work for, but at least it worked).

All this to say that "go work on yourself " is for sure not a solution across the board, although it can work for many. And perhaps the people it worked for are more bisexual rather than gay, and they just needed to find the right opposite gender individual.

[imayid2]

This created some controversy. I don’t have the link but in volume 13 Rabbi Rapoport responded in an article titled Judaism and Homosexuality: An Alternative Rabbinic View.
Also see here:
https://seforimblog.com/2013/01/hakirah-metzitzah-and-more

I would agree with the commentator pointing out that Shapiro has created a strawman.
Specifically, he’s conveniently ignoring Footnote 3 in the article:

Overcoming” in this context is best thought of on a spectrum ranging from total eradication of the inclination and resolution of the previous unresolved feelings leading to the behavior to simply controlling the be- havior. The outcome may depend upon several factors such as the per- sonal motivation and will to overcome unwanted SSA, the amount of work done by a person in counseling, the amount of co-morbid emotion- al issues the individual presents with (e.g., depression, Obsessive- Compulsive Disorder, addictions etc.), the length of time the person en- gaged in homosexual ideation or behavior, etc.

[Definitions]

I'm assuming you're referring to conversion therapy.

The general medical community has banned this.

I've seen headlines about this. Never read the actual articles. Maybe I'll do that later.

I don't get the reason to ban it. What's the issue?

[yr]

I've seen headlines about this. Never read the actual articles. Maybe I'll do that later.

I don't get the reason to ban it. What's the issue?

It isn't as effective as advertised and is painful.

[mevinyavin]

you are assuming the child cannot work on themselves to gain an attraction to the apposite gender.

Interestingly, as a maamin and being told nothing on the subject in my education, I had assumed this to be the case (having no personal experience). Then I read Rav Ahron Feldman's Eye of the Storm, and in his article on SS attraction, he mentions no such possibility. I remember being shocked.
(He basically says (I hope - I saw this years ago) A. You can manage control because that's what Hashem wants, and it may be tough and you may fail but obviously you are holy for being trusted with such a nisayon from Hashem B. You can do things for Yiddishkeit that someone who isn't locked into a marriage can do, like travel to places without a mikva/schools and do kiruv C. Maybe maybe maybe you can find a precious neshama who is willing to marry you and try to work with you, and over time you may succeed in having children.)

[avromie7]

https://asknoah.org/wp-content/uploads/rebbe-letter-to-man-struggling-with-homosexuality.pdf

Rav Gershon Weiss ZT"L was the Menahel in YSI under HaRav Moshe Feinsten. He was speaking to Rav Moshe about a boy in the yeshiva who was a kleptomaniac. When Rav Gershon referred to it as a "machlah", Rav Moshe corrected him "yetzer hara".

[m65]

It isn't as effective as advertised and is painful.

just as most treatments for any serious ailment
medical or psychological
but this is the most bashed one, because it goes against the narrative