The School Crisis

[EJB]

why should a valid reason help? its not a punishment rather a consequence of fear of influence? (not saying i agree, just on that side i dont see why a valid reason should make a diff.)

Because the torah doesn't assur the Internet. It can be something potentially dangerous, so surfing perhaps should be w a "kosher" internet. But if the filters aren't usable for your specific situation , perhaps another solution will be more appropriate (eg kids have no access and you provide a rabbi w website log access)

[theblakdavid]

Because the torah doesn't assur the Internet.

The internet wasn't around in biblical times. But there are enough "issurim" , whether biblical or rabbinical, that can be applied to unfiltered internet according to many rabbonim.

[sky121]

Bad things can be done with internet . The same can be said for a gun for instance. 

(I'm a for filters BTW)

Again, this isn't the point.

[chinagel]

Bad things can be done with internet . The same can be said for a gun for instance. 

and being in a room alone with a woman

[efflpetzel]

OOPs!! Gan yisroel is lubavitch

http://www.chabad.org/centers/default_cdo/aid/118340/jewish/Chabad-Lubavitch-of-Boro-Park.htm

And

besides the fact that chabad.org lists them, Gan Yisroel of BP has nothing to do with lubavitch. 0

[yesitsme]

Back in the day we would go to the river and wash our clothes, finally the wash machine was invented and we don't have to scrub and rub that much what a relief, No risks involved (Just make sure your drain works well).

Back in the day we used to bring our dough to the community oven to bake our challah, finally the personnal gas stoves where developed what a pleasure we can bake at home as much as we want, But you gotta be careful if your little one decides to tap the broiler while the oven is on it can be very painful, thankfully Hashem made that they should jump when they feel that hot surface.

Back in the pre internet days things where so much different it literately changed every aspect of our day to day operations, Without internet I'm out of a job, But you gotta be careful... a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, and since the international Network is a chain of the World Wide Web there are many weak links out there

By the time one notices where he got himself into it's a bit late, whether its in Ruchniyus, financially (So many people wired hundred thousands of dollars to Niagara not expecting to see it back), or hack and spam Ransom-ware (I know a company just spent $20,000 to recover) Malware Phishing etc,
And how many work hours is wasted on the web, therefore it's beneficial for everyone to have the right filters in place.

And if you dont want to have that filter in place, the school has to put a filter on the applicants.

[ExGingi]

My husband and I both work. We consider ourselves chassidish but we're not affiliated with any particular sect. We speak English and Yiddish in our home. We don't have movies or a TV, we both have smartphones + wifi. We're pretty middle class.

What does that mean to you?

I'm not sure what typical means nowadays. I don't buy into the whole double life many MANY people have today where they are chassidish on the outside and barely shomer Shabbos on the inside. With my husband and I- what you see is what you get.

So it seems like רבן גמליאל would have accepted your husband, and not those many people (https://he.wikisource.org/wiki/%D7%91%D7%A8%D7%9B%D7%95%D7%AA_%D7%9B%D7%97_%D7%90) but the schools seem to insist on not standing up to רבן גמליאל's standard (as the sages in his time didn't).

BYBP expected my 4 yr old to be able to write her own name, draw shapes, identify all aleph bet and alphabet.

Why is this a problem? This seems like an academic standard. Not all 4 year olds are ready at the same time, some kids need more time at home.

Gan Yisroel said no uncle Moishy/yeshivah boys choir/smartphones w/o filter

I have verified this with a friend of mine who used to work in G.Y. administration. IMHO Rabbi Ginsberg would have a tough time explaining how his policy is congruent with the Rebbe's directives as per this (which I just saw this week in a publication I believe Rabbi Ginsberg probably reads):

Bais Yaakov of B said no chalav stam (not that it matters. They didn't want us anyway. We don't fit their type)

Is this an issue for you? I try to avoid labeling any one, but you self-identified as Chassidish, wouldn't that mean strictly Cholov Yisroel?

Munkatch had no reason with their rejection
Satmar said no radio (yes. Apparently were in the 50's)
Both bobavs said no space
Sora schner, Bais shufra Miriam, BYA, prospect park, yeshiva of B, yeshiva of FB, and a few others never responded to my application despite many calls
BY d'rav Meir called us for an interview but I heard from a few people that they (like vien) are way too posh and would never take us. So we didn't even bother running after them
BY18 has a 3 year waiting list and only accepts siblings

I am not rushing to judge, but this reminds me of a place I worked at a while ago. Two people were about to be let go. One person was called in to the manager, and told that he is being terminated. He left without saying a word. The other was told the same thing, but tried putting up an argument, that argument showed the manager that the person was at least somewhat motivated, and the person was not terminated at that time.

Without rushing to judge, did you try to put up a fight at any of these? Some of the arguments are very weak. However one has to understand the constant challenge that administrators have, they have to control the gates to a certain extent in order to maintain their school. However, of the entire list (and those that are not there) I find it hard to believe that not one school would have accepted if you would have tried putting up an argument, committing to a certain PERSONAL change in the direction required, etc. etc.

[stbaum]

.

I hate when people quote huge messages and then take them apart. My op wasn't a cry for help or ideas how to fit into a school that didn't want me/where I didn't belong. It was commiseration.

Like I've said before, I've bh found a great school by the grace of god. They accept my family and my daughter the way we are. They appreciate that we are a very mixed chasidish family with weak roots.

We feel like we belong and my daughter is loved. It takes prayers and tears. It's easy to lose faith but bh here we are.

I hope you all have a gut gebentcht yur and may Mrs Miriam Berg in particular burn in hell

Cheers!

[Bukboy]

I hate when people quote huge messages and then take them apart. My op wasn't a cry for help or ideas how to fit into a school that didn't want me/where I didn't belong. It was commiseration.

Like I've said before, I've bh found a great school by the grace of god. They accept my family and my daughter the way we are. They appreciate that we are a very mixed chasidish family with weak roots.

We feel like we belong and my daughter is loved. It takes prayers and tears. It's easy to lose faith but bh here we are.

I hope you all have a gut gebentcht yur and may Mrs Miriam Berg in particular burn in hell

Cheers!

So basically your'e putting out your'e opinion on a forum about who should go to hell without letting anyone argue about it, Not wise at all

[stbaum]

So basically your'e putting out your'e opinion on a forum about who should go to hell without letting anyone argue about it, Not wise at all

Once she's at the gates she will be let known.

[ExGingi]

I hate when people quote huge messages and then take them apart. My op wasn't a cry for help or ideas how to fit into a school that didn't want me/where I didn't belong. It was commiseration.

Sorry, wasn't paying enough attention http://www.marsvenus.com/p/men-are-from-mars-women-are-from-venus-hardcover

[David Smith]

You do not want to go into the yomim noraim like that.

[Work-for-ur-muny]

You do not want to go into the yomim noraim like that.

Good point. But never judge the hurt; their shoes are not your size.

[Bukboy]

Good point. But never judge the hurt; their shoes are not your size.

Nobody judges, Read through all the posts here everyone trying not to judge and white glove, But by writing names on a forum of ppl to go to hell, Bashing schools etc. i think its fair enough if someone wants to defend the schools he should be allowed to

[Bukboy]

And to be quite honest i'm on the other side of the coin, I'm personally involved on a day to day basis fighting with "menahlim" from yeshivas to except bucherem that we're kicked out from yeshiva or don't have one yet, The hard part isn't convincing the rosh yeshiva or menahal etc. to except the bucher under terms its making sure the bucher is serious about excepting and keeping up with the terms

[rileywiles23]

For all those looking for reasons why even filtered internet can be quite a problem, this thread is a great example.
Straight up lashon hara ( or maybe even Motzi Shem Ra ) at its finest.

[Cheesecake]

For all those looking for reasons why even filtered internet can be quite a problem, this thread is a great example.
Straight up lashon hara ( or maybe even Motzi Shem Ra ) at its finest.

+1 Probably motzi shem ra.

[Emkay]

+1 Probably motzi shem ra.

Oh, the irony.

[Cheesecake]

Oh, the irony.

If so, likewise. ('וכו)

[efflpetzel]

What does that mean to you?
So it seems like רבן גמליאל would have accepted your husband, and not those many people (https://he.wikisource.org/wiki/%D7%91%D7%A8%D7%9B%D7%95%D7%AA_%D7%9B%D7%97_%D7%90) but the schools seem to insist on not standing up to רבן גמליאל's standard (as the sages in his time didn't).
Why is this a problem? This seems like an academic standard. Not all 4 year olds are ready at the same time, some kids need more time at home.
I have verified this with a friend of mine who used to work in G.Y. administration. IMHO Rabbi Ginsberg would have a tough time explaining how his policy is congruent with the Rebbe's directives as per this (which I just saw this week in a publication I believe Rabbi Ginsberg probably reads):

Is this an issue for you? I try to avoid labeling any one, but you self-identified as Chassidish, wouldn't that mean strictly Cholov Yisroel?

I am not rushing to judge, but this reminds me of a place I worked at a while ago. Two people were about to be let go. One person was called in to the manager, and told that he is being terminated. He left without saying a word. The other was told the same thing, but tried putting up an argument, that argument showed the manager that the person was at least somewhat motivated, and the person was not terminated at that time.

Without rushing to judge, did you try to put up a fight at any of these? Some of the arguments are very weak. However one has to understand the constant challenge that administrators have, they have to control the gates to a certain extent in order to maintain their school. However, of the entire list (and those that are not there) I find it hard to believe that not one school would have accepted if you would have tried putting up an argument, committing to a certain PERSONAL change in the direction required, etc. etc.

Very very easy to see that you don't live in BP