Its called poverty and indeed its horrible.
distasteful?
you should never know.
And i spend allot more than 40 for shabbos. but if you must it can be done
I knew as I was writing that I would get lit up for this, obviously I am not referring to someone who is truly impoverished. But believe it or not, the OP nor almost everyone else here is in dire poverty. I know this by looking at the budget that OP proposed. In it he includes, dry cleaning and rent (implying that they have their own place and are not living with parents/family). Furthermore, the OP is choosing to go to kollel, while this is a wonderful thing to do, he has the option of getting a paying job if her were truly impoverished.
Everyone has different priorities and I understand that, but to me to budget food to such an extent
is distasteful. I'm all for having some idea of how much you spend - even on food - but to nitpick whether it's $35 or $40 for a shabbos meal and whether you can get 1 danish or 2 desserts just seems silly when there are things that can make a much greater impact (budget-wise) with less detriment to one's sanity while shopping.