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I created an account to say this

I am a survivor of abuse

I tried to type up a longer, more detailed post but it got too hard. The bottom line is the following

There's no such thing as universal feelings, reactions, desires, needs that all victims share. Each one is an individual who suffered alone and carries the unique scars that stay with them and each one will react to future situations in life in their own way.

Therefore, there is no single response to abuse that will leave all victims feeling safe, secure, validated, supported, closure and everything else all the well meaning people here want to give them.

However, I think there is a single response that would leave all victims feeling further pain and trauma and that is "It can't be."

Rabbi Shimon Russell - How to Safeguard and Protect our Children

https://youtu.be/fefqSvXf0JI


« Last edited by Yehuda57 on January 12, 2022, 05:44:00 PM »

Author Topic: Chaim Walder dies  (Read 132566 times)

Offline Yehuda57

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #600 on: December 31, 2021, 12:25:33 AM »
Is this a reputable BD? Authentic letter?

I thought we could only rely on a BD from Bnei Brak

Offline Euclid

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #601 on: December 31, 2021, 12:29:00 AM »
I thought we could only rely on a BD from Bnei Brak
and Ashkenazi





Offline Euclid

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #602 on: December 31, 2021, 09:41:45 AM »
R' Yitzchak Berkovits' address to mental health professionals

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1lQjyvHzd7ynjDXEFl-iEmiJo2I71Nk1b/view?usp=sharing

Offline AsherO

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #603 on: December 31, 2021, 10:22:58 AM »
R' Yitzchak Berkovits' address to mental health professionals

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1lQjyvHzd7ynjDXEFl-iEmiJo2I71Nk1b/view?usp=sharing

Too much ambiguity and jumping around from one issue to another.
DDF FFB (Forum From Birth)

Offline PlatinumGuy

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #604 on: December 31, 2021, 11:34:08 AM »
https://www.haaretz.co.il/amp/news/law/.premium-1.10505197

Very accurate from what I can tell. Google headline to bypass paywall.
״וזה כלל גדול: שישנא אדם כל דבר שקר. וכל מה שיוסיף שנאה לדרכי השקר – יוסיף אהבה לתורה.״ - אורחות צדיקים

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #605 on: December 31, 2021, 11:50:07 AM »
These matters will never be solved by the institutions themselves. We should all learn from history and not repeat it.
The only moral thing to do is blow this out of the water. It will be painful but it the long run it will be the right and moral thing to do.
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Offline Yehuda57

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #606 on: December 31, 2021, 12:00:02 PM »
These matters will never be solved by the institutions themselves. We should all learn from history and not repeat it.
The only moral thing to do is blow this out of the water. It will be painful but it the long run it will be the right and moral thing to do.

That seems to be what's happening.

https://twitter.com/fainys/status/1476803496624246786

Like @aygart and others keep saying, if we don't listen and support, the victims will need to find their support elsewhere.

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #607 on: December 31, 2021, 12:01:45 PM »
That seems to be what's happening.
I can only pray it does happen and continues.
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Offline Dan

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #608 on: December 31, 2021, 12:09:16 PM »
Save your time, I don't answer PM. Post it in the forum and a dedicated DDF'er will get back to you as soon as possible.

Offline aygart

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #609 on: December 31, 2021, 01:32:21 PM »
I can only pray it does happen and continues.
I see you did not quote the last line and I am happy that you didn't. It is important that it be blown out of the water within the community. If there is a need for them to go out of the community that is a problem too. It makes victims feel that now they are forced out of the commmunity they greww up in due to the abuse which makes them a victim all over again.
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #610 on: December 31, 2021, 01:39:59 PM »
I see you did not quote the last line and I am happy that you didn't. It is important that it be blown out of the water within the community. If there is a need for them to go out of the community that is a problem too. It makes victims feel that now they are forced out of the commmunity they greww up in due to the abuse which makes them a victim all over again.
By saying blown out of the water I mean I have zero confidence this can be addressed properly within any closed community. This is nothing against Judaism as I believe this for any closed community. Catholics was a closed community at one point when this exact same thing festered. I wish I was wrong, but history says otherwise.

Only on DDF does 24/6 mean 24/5/half/half
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Offline aygart

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #611 on: December 31, 2021, 02:10:24 PM »
By saying blown out of the water I mean I have zero confidence this can be addressed properly within any closed community. This is nothing against Judaism as I believe this for any closed community. Catholics was a closed community at one point when this exact same thing festered. I wish I was wrong, but history says otherwise.



It does not need to be closed or without outside involvement.
Feelings don't care about your facts

Offline lansky

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #612 on: December 31, 2021, 02:16:24 PM »
By saying blown out of the water I mean I have zero confidence this can be addressed properly within any closed community. This is nothing against Judaism as I believe this for any closed community. Catholics was a closed community at one point when this exact same thing festered. I wish I was wrong, but history says otherwise.
this has nothing to do with religion  go look at Hollywood,  any country like China they just sweep it under the same way, it's unfortunate that certain people hijack our religion, but it's irrelevant to the religion itself

Offline Euclid

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Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #613 on: December 31, 2021, 02:19:37 PM »
this has nothing to do with religion  go look at Hollywood,  any country like China they just sweep it under the same way, it's unfortunate that certain people hijack our religion, but it's irrelevant to the religion itself
Who said anything about religion? He said "closed community". Or are you agreeing with him?

Offline PlatinumGuy

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #614 on: December 31, 2021, 02:20:44 PM »


Sick
״וזה כלל גדול: שישנא אדם כל דבר שקר. וכל מה שיוסיף שנאה לדרכי השקר – יוסיף אהבה לתורה.״ - אורחות צדיקים

Offline CountValentine

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #615 on: December 31, 2021, 02:27:53 PM »
this has nothing to do with religion  go look at Hollywood,  any country like China they just sweep it under the same way, it's unfortunate that certain people hijack our religion, but it's irrelevant to the religion itself
So you want me to look at Hollywood which I consider a closed community?

Take classes about sexual abuse, go to seminars about sexual abuse, listen to the experts in the field and then come back at tell me where predators will have the easiest time.
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Offline Abebee

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #616 on: December 31, 2021, 02:50:38 PM »



Offline WonderingYid

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #617 on: December 31, 2021, 03:01:49 PM »

Offline Euclid

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Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #618 on: December 31, 2021, 03:03:21 PM »

Lol that they think their students wouldn't have heard about this on the street. Always good to have oblivious people on the hanahla of a school.

Offline flyingace

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Re: Chaim Walder dies
« Reply #619 on: December 31, 2021, 03:09:13 PM »
Lol that they think their students wouldn't have heard about this on the street. Always good to have oblivious people on the hanahla of a school.
Doesn't say that...Clearly says they have heard it...