Would this change the shidduch picture conversation?

[etech0]

TLDR?

I've only read bits and pieces out of order. Maybe someone else can help with that.

[zh cohen]

TLDR?

I think this is the article that started it. - https://mishpacha.com/facing-the-right-direction/

The next week there was a Kichels cartoon about how a picture sent "just to one person" ends up traveling the world.

Then there was a letter from a bochur who said that (unlike some of his friends) he doesn't save and pass around pictures, he just looks once and deletes them.

[EliJelly]

You aren't finding that out in 5-10 dates anyhow. The whole dating thing is overrated. Either you put proper effort into your marriage and the dates are barely needed or you don't and they barely help.

Welcome to the Chassidish (aka traditional) shidduchim process.. The info that is needed is mainly gathered by the parents, including photos exchanging.

[aygart]

Welcome to the Chassidish (aka traditional) shidduchim process.. The info that is needed is mainly gathered by the parents, including photos exchanging.

I would advocate for the European style of around 3/4 dates.

[TzviR]

there are programs that protect content from screenshot
but I don't think that's feasible in browser-based sharing

ETA: screenshotting not necessary here image can be copied/saved as a regular image. meh

Instagram doesn't allow screenshots on their website.

Once something is online in any format it's there to stay. Period.

Anything that's shared "once" or in "only one group" shall always be assumed to be shared way more than that.

Once something is online it's not going away, even if you disable screenshots etc.

[yesitsme]

Instagram doesn't allow screenshots on their website.

they can make it harder, but not impossible

And I hate those sites that disable paste (like chase) or the context menu (like TLS)

[etech0]

they can make it harder, but not impossible

And I hate those sites that disable paste (like chase) or the context menu (like TLS)

Someone can still take a picture using another device

[yungermanchik]

Instagram doesn't allow screenshots on their website.

Win+Shift+S doesn't work? (not that I know otherwise, just sounds interesting)

[yesitsme]

Someone can still take a picture using another device

with F12 you can do anything you want

[etech0]

with F12 you can do anything you want

also true

[TzviR]

Win+Shift+S doesn't work? (not that I know otherwise, just sounds interesting)

My experience was on mobile

[yelped]

they can make it harder, but not impossible

And I hate those sites that disable paste (like chase) or the context menu (like TLS)

Just disable javascript for TLS.

[Yonah]

the form that @PlatinumGuy posted reminded me of this joke:

Yankel is about to go on his first shidduch date, and has never really talked to a girl so he asks his father for advice. His father says, dating is about tachlis, so you need to cover three important topics:
- Food
- Family
- Philosophy

Yankel thinks this is solid advice, and heads off on his date with Bracha.

Of course the date starts off very awkwardly, and the conversation isn't really flowing, so Yankel remembers his father's advice, and decides to ask about food:
"Tell me," he says to Bracha, " do you like Lokshon?"
"No", replies Bracha.

Five more awkward minutes go by, and he decides to ask about family:
"Does your brother like lokshon?", he asks
"I don't have any brothers, only sisters", comes Bracha's reply.

After a few more awkward minutes, he decides to give his Dad's plan one more shot - and ask a Philosophy Question:
"Tell me, if you had a brother, do you think he'd like Lokshon?"

[Ergel]

I think this is the article that started it. - https://mishpacha.com/facing-the-right-direction/

The next week there was a Kichels cartoon about how a picture sent "just to one person" ends up traveling the world.

Then there was a letter from a bochur who said that (unlike some of his friends) he doesn't save and pass around pictures, he just looks once and deletes them.

https://mishpacha.com/no-further-questions/ this was actually what started it

[ExGingi]

You aren't finding that out in 5-10 dates anyhow. The whole dating thing is overrated. Either you put proper effort into your marriage and the dates are barely needed or you don't and they barely help.

I'm too lazy/busy to MBM like this, please consider this MBM liked to whatever power you can think of.

[ExGingi]

the form that @PlatinumGuy posted reminded me of this joke:

Yankel is about to go on his first shidduch date, and has never really talked to a girl so he asks his father for advice. His father says, dating is about tachlis, so you need to cover three important topics:
- Food
- Family
- Philosophy

Yankel thinks this is solid advice, and heads off on his date with Bracha.

Of course the date starts off very awkwardly, and the conversation isn't really flowing, so Yankel remembers his father's advice, and decides to ask about food:
"Tell me," he says to Bracha, " do you like Lokshon?"
"No", replies Bracha.

Five more awkward minutes go by, and he decides to ask about family:
"Does your brother like lokshon?", he asks
"I don't have any brothers, only sisters", comes Bracha's reply.

After a few more awkward minutes, he decides to give his Dad's plan one more shot - and ask a Philosophy Question:
"Tell me, if you had a brother, do you think he'd like Lokshon?"

How many more versions of this are we going to get before this thread goes out of vogue? @YitzyS does this belong in the DDF cliche thread?

[Dan]

You aren't finding that out in 5-10 dates anyhow. The whole dating thing is overrated. Either you put proper effort into your marriage and the dates are barely needed or you don't and they barely help.

Disagree.

You won't learn everything, but with 5-10 dates you can learn how someone reacts to different situations and people, what they like doing or don't like doing, if they have any mannerisms that you can't stand, etc.

[ExGingi]

Disagree.

You won't learn everything, but with 5-10 dates you can learn how someone reacts to different situations and people, what they like doing or don't like doing, if they have any mannerisms that you can't stand, etc.

You really think 5-10 dates are better than 3-5 dates?

[Dan]

You really think 5-10 dates are better than 3-5 dates?

Speaking from personal experience, yes. YMMV I suppose based on how perceptive you are.

I always prepared a few date options for girls to choose from. I found what they picked and how they enjoyed them to be enlightening and more telling than canned answers.

[Yehuda57]

You really think 5-10 dates are better than 3-5 dates?

Absofreakinglutely